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Dont know how to stop

 
Matt535
(@matt535)

Hey all, im 19 but ive been gambling since i was as young as i can remember, it started when i was like 8 or so i dont know exactly but then it went on to video game skin gambling sites when i was around 12 and onwards id buy skins and promise myself i wouldnt gamble them but i wouldnt have them in my account for more than a few days, i got money on by telling my sister i wanted to use her account to buy something as i was underage and didnt have access to my own, i did this so many times i dont even want to think about how much ive spent in this. My gambling stopped for a while after this a few years maybe but as soon as i turned 18 and had access to my own bank account id see people gambling on a live streaming platform or my mum gambling  and id ask to play, nobody close to me knows about my addiction and its just eating me up. I struggle with depression in general and when im bored or in a low mood i just cant stop myself its like it gives me something to be depressed about other than just life in general its almost like a form of self harm. Im on gamstop for a second time, i thought i was stronger and smarter after my first exclusion but i wasnt. Compared to some people ive not lost that much yet and i know im still young but the majority of money ive had coming in all my life has just gone onto gambling. Im on gamstop now but i just cant help myself i have my card connected to my mums account and i just lost my last £50 after reaching her weekly deposit limit again. I keep telling myself this is the last straw i will stop but im just so weak-willed and i know i have nobody to blame but me but it doesnt matter what i tell myself or how stupid i know it is i just cant stop. Its so embarrassing ive been trying to save to visit my long distance gf for so long now and my bank is now empty again. Just had to get this out there thanks for reading

This topic was modified 1 month ago by Forum admin
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Topic starter Posted : 27th May 2022 4:46 am
Forum admin
(@forum-admin)
Admin

Dear @Matt535

Thank you for posting and welcome to the GamCare forum. I am really glad you have joined and hope you find the support from other members to be helpful.

It sounds as though it's been a really hard time and that it has been stressful for you with no one close to you knowing about your addiction. You are never alone in this as the forum is available 24 hours and we also have group chats every day at 1pm and 8pm in our online group chatroom. Gamblers Anonymous also hold group supportive meetings, both in person and through Zoom; you can attend a Zoom meeting for any area.

I would encourage you to speak with an advisor on 0808 8020 133 or on Netline (both available 24 hours). They can discuss with you various options that can help, including free professional support for problem gambling recovery. With the right support in place, people can and do recover from problem gambling. 

I would also suggest that you speak with your GP to access support around your depression. https://www.mind.org.uk/  also have lots of mental health resources and can direct you to local support. 

Please keep posting; we are here to support you.

Best wishes,

Sophie

Forum Admin

 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 27th May 2022 12:52 pm
GREG
 GREG
(@gdiddycourogen)

Take it from someone who destroyed hi life between the ages of 40 and 50 after never even thinking about gambling twice before then….   We need to get you to stop NOW!  It’s all to get dopamine to feel good….and then your body wants more dopamine.  We need to release it through exercise, through having s*x, through earning money another way.  I’m sure you have many talents that you haven’t tapped into yet.  You are so young.  I know you can get this shop going in the right direction.  For me, I finally got disgusted knowing that I was betting on losers every time.  The odds are stacked against us.  I have found one thing for sure is true that people say…. You have to WANT to quit.  It’s like flushing your money down the toilet.  I know I WANT to stop doing that!  You can do it, too.  You must involve yourself heavily in other things to distract you and then seek help to understand how you ended up in this hell.  I am doing all I can to head up the stairs out of this hell.  Please stop going down those stairs, turn around, and walk back up with me.  I would love the company!

Greg

 

ps. I will be on these stairs the rest of my life.  The urges are I’ll always be there….but I refuse to turn around and acknowledge them.  When I hear them, I run in a different direction (to the gym, call a friend, go for a walk, start a project, etc)

This post was modified 1 month ago by Forum admin
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Posted : 27th May 2022 1:58 pm
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