Day 7 of coming clean

Keep visiting regularly.  Have a read around. Chat when you're ready.

Well done for recognising the issue.  You're a young man with everything to beat this for. I wish you all the best.

Hi ste 

we are all different gamblers.  Just like an alcoholic I guess.  Some need to drink every day and some binge to excess.

i find certain times of the month are dangerous for me.  After payday.  After the 1st when most bills have gone out and still have money.  Weekends if I am bored.  We all have triggers.  For some people this week royal ascot will be hell.  My weakness is online slots and therefore I have installed gamstop to try and help me.

put blocks in place of your habit if you can.  Will power is great but it fades, usually when we need it most.

have a read of other stories, diaries and group chat is good at 8pm.  Well done for recognizing the problem ?

Hi

I was completely consumed with fears on walking in to the recovery program.

In time I would identify when I was feeling emotionally vulnerable.

Once I put a lot of time and effort in to my recovery and handed over all of my finances and started to abstain my recovery was going to become much easier.

The money was just the fuel for my addiction.

I did not respect myself and I did not respect money.

I was unable to show appreciation and gratitude sincerely.

Each time I went back to my addictions I needed to understand what was my last emotional trigger was.

The recovery program helped me understand that I was like a rat in a wheel going faster and faster getting no where healthy.

Just because I abstained from gambling did not mean I would try and find other ways of escaping people life and  situations.

Emotional triggers would hit me when I least expected them to do so.

I did not know how to celebrate in healthy ways.

My emotional age and my physical age did not match up.

Once I started to exchange unhealthy habits in to healthy habits my recovery sped up.

By being more accountable to myself and honest with myself I was going to come out of my shell built of fears.

By writing down my needs, writing down my wants, and writing down my goals I was going to extend myself in so many ways.

At the recovery meetings I was going to expose more and more of myself through my therapies and to able to articulate my feelings and emotions in healthy ways.

My fear of being honest would reduce, I would trust more, I would come out of myself even more.

The recovery program was going to help me heal my hurt inner child.

The addictions and obsessions were a form of escaping in my fears, the addictions and obsessions were a symptom that I was emotionally vulnerable.

Please keep going to meetings, you will benefit from it in so many ways.

Love and peace to every one.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham