ive only just joined this forum. I’m 40 years of age and I’ve been gambling for 25 years. It’s taking me this long to realise I have a serious problem.
I have gone through highs and lows in that time. It’s cost me a marriage, house everything.
I got paid on Tuesday and I have no excuses but I lost the lot by Thursday. I’ve not paid my rent or any of my bills. On Friday it all got to much and I ended up taking a load of tablets. Just wanted to make it all go away.
I came out of hospital and I went straight on GameStop and self excluded from all sites for 5 years. I also phoned up gambling hotline and I have someone ringing me back tomorrow to start therapy.
its all my own fault I know and I just wanted to get some feedback on this?
also my partner as said she wants nothing more to do with me.
Sorry to hear your story but it sounds like you've reached your rock bottom.
My advice is to try to get to a GA meeting initially just to be around other like minded people and get a chance to get a clear head. I'm not a big fan of starting counselling or therapy straight away, it's all a bit too raw, but it will give you someone to talk to even if it's to just talk.
Keep your diary on here going and read through the other threads to see if there's anyone you can identify with. That helps.
Hi gw james and welcome.
When you have studied this addiction as I have, You will realise its not all your own fault but you have to accept full responsibility for your actions to recover
I know the deep pain and the misery. You are not alone with this addiction and you have to seek some consolation from that.
You are still with us and that is a blessing you will come to cherish. You are still around to say sorry to your loved ones and they will come to understand that a gambling addiction is a drug addiction and mind control illness.
I dont know of a gambler on here that did it with an evil laugh to hurt people. We were addicts beyond control and there is help to recover. Like all gambling addicts I was gambling with my relationships and my future.
You have to use all thought processes now. You will earn money again and build a better future . You will finally understand whats important as the fog of confusion lifts
With a born again moment your aim is a peace of mind and a serenity in life
Best wishes from everyone on the forum
you have everything to gain moving forwards from now if you choose the right path. Nothing is worth hurting yourself for. You will see from this forum that people care and that there can be a bright future and a positive way out of a situation that can feel so terrible at the time.
all the best and take care
I get you in more ways than you know I also took the wrong way out choosing tablets and like yourself ended up in hospital. I know now that it was the wrong thing to do but at the time it seemed the only way out. Well your still here and doing the right things plus I also would suppose you've got support from the crisis team ect from your area, gambling is evil and it leaves us in low places but by talking one day at a time we can get past this living the life we deserve and no amount of money is worth your life I hope you know that!
I just want to come on to say it will get better, it won’t be easy but it will get better and there is options. I’ve gambled for the last ten years, on and off, always falling off the wagon and it got progressively worse to the point I was in 27K worth of debt. I’m now in a trust deed for my debt but that didn’t stop me falling back off the wagon even though I knew they would check my payslips. The only thing that worked for me and has made sure I am Over 200 days gamble free is gamban .. I tried gamstop which stops you signing up on websites using your details but eventually I just used my husbands details whereas gamban is a blocker on your phone that stops you loading any website to do with gambling. Although this only helped me because all my gambling was online slots and I know this isn’t the case for everyone. I eventually plucked up the courage at the start of this year to tell my husband and my dad which was really hard. I’m here to say There is hope.