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clarkjohnken
(@clarkjohnken)

I've just joined. Last week I found out that my husband has a major addiction. He's gambled himself into £**k of debt (this time), unbeknown to me. We own a house which we've only recently bought and have been renovating because it was meant to be our dream, forever home. We have a 5 year old too. I am majorly struggling with the implications of all of this. I don't want her to have to move again (it was a whole relocation and school move recently) or lose the house but I work part time and don't know how to afford it on my own. If we sell it, I'll be in a worse position with what's left, having to move her into a much less desirable area, away from her school friends because that's all I'll probably be allowed to take out (mortgage wise). I can't sleep worrying about how to provide for her. Staying with my husband isn't an option, as I'll live in constant fear of him doing it again and risking our security. Not to mention the complete lack of trust - he'd opened secret accounts and email addresses and all sorts to hide this! Plus I'd suspected a problem a year or so ago and offered help and he just played it down and returned to gambling anyway. Sorry it's so long. Any advice for how to move forward? I feel so sad all of the time about what's possibly going to happen to my daughter's life

 
This topic was modified 3 weeks ago by Forum admin
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Posted : 11th March 2020 8:45 am
Merry go round
(@merry-go-round)

Hi this is a frightening scenario, divorce, selling your home etc. Try to change your thought process. He needs help. However angry you are, you need to focus on how to stop the losses.

you say you knew a year ago. Compulsive gambling is a serious addiction. So now it's far worse, debts higher, his mental health deteriorated. 

There is lots of help available. Call gamcare and talk to someone. Encourage him to go to GA. Take over finances. Find a gamanon meeting. Stepchange are a debt charity who can help him. Do credit checks.

You need to act otherwise as you say there will be nothing left.

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Posted : 12th March 2020 8:49 am
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