I need help and support had enough

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Sandy1401
(@sandy1401)
Posts: 3
Topic starter
 

I have been with my husband for over7 years, I did not know he was a gambler always covered his tracks. 
I found out about 3 years ago and I should have left but I stayed. 
I am at the end of my tether . I need help he is draining the family. I am fed up with the threats, lies, deceit. 
he says he owes loan sharks and on pay day by 10am he is broke !!

i can’t do this anymore but also feel guilty, he is refusing to leave as he has nowhere to go and it is my house 

what do I do 

 
Posted : 23rd February 2020 3:35 pm
Forum admin
(@forum-admin)
Posts: 5975
Admin
 

Dear @sandy1401,

Thank you for posting on our forum, please continue to keep accessing our forum for support from your peers. 

You may also benefit from coming along to one of our Family and Friend chat rooms on a Wednesday evening between 7pm and 8pm. You can also access an online meeting with another organisation that runs every Sunday from 8pm until 9pm, this again is specifically for the Family and Friends of problem gamblers.

They also have meetings that you can attend in person, full details are on their website.

http://gamanon.org.uk/?page_id=30

We're here for everyone affected by problem gambling and we're able to give details of other organisations for anything that we can't directly help with such as financial matters, housing or legal.

There is also a loan shark helpline that your husband can call for further support by visiting

https://www.stoploansharks.co.uk/we-can-help/

You may find speaking to the Citizens Advice for further support with your situation helpful too.

Do you feel safe and able to talk to your husband to ask him to call us for support and help with the problem gambling please? If he needs advice with housing then he can speak to Shelter as per details on the below link. 

https://england.shelter.org.uk/

He could also contact his local council regarding emergency housing and any local housing associations too.

There is no judgement or blame when you speak to us, we're here for everyone affected by problem gambling.

Please remember that it is ok to put your own wellbeing first if you feel you're no longer able to live with the negative impacts of your husbands problem gambling. If you would like to talk this through further and perhaps have a free referral for counselling made then please contact our helpline on 0808 8020 133 or access our Netline via our GamCare website.

Alternatively, if you would prefer a call back then please email your details to @gamcare.org.uk">forumadmin@gamcare.org.

Take care @sandy1401.

Kindest regards

Joanne

Forum Admin

 

This post was modified 4 years ago 4 times by Forum admin
 
Posted : 23rd February 2020 4:56 pm
S.A
 S.A
(@s-687)
Posts: 4883
 

Hi Sandy... sorry to hear about your situation. I don't really have any answers, other than you have nothing to feel guilty about. If he is shrewd enough to conceal his gambling then he is perfectly capable of finding a new home for himself. Based on what you say you really don't want this addict in your life. I am a gambling addict and I certainly wouldn't live with one.

All the best moving forward.

 
Posted : 25th February 2020 10:18 am
(@kppeanut)
Posts: 1
 

Hi Sandy,

my husband is also a compulsive gambler, he has not gambled for two days now but emotionally it’s had the biggest impact on us. I would get some advice regarding housing as your partner may have a right to remain in the house, however given the situation it might be worth seeing if there are other options. I really do know how you’re feeling though it’s unbearable at times. The only thing I can advise is to try not to take on his responsibilities and to look after yourself financially and emotionally.

Take care x

 
Posted : 25th February 2020 9:07 pm

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