He moved out today

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(@chanty)
Posts: 9
Topic starter
 

He moved into his mum’s today. I do feel sad but also relieved. Thank you everyone for your input 

 
Posted : 14th March 2020 9:41 pm
(@lebear)
Posts: 2
 

Hugs to you x

You are clearly a strong lady who wants to do right by her family and I admire that so much.  Even during the tough times, remember your strength x

 
Posted : 15th March 2020 8:10 am
Joydivider
(@joydivider)
Posts: 2156
 

Well It does make me sad that the devastating power of gambling addiction will do this time and time again to people.

However the tried and trusted advice is that you are protected and he seeks help. Many partners have to split up and you should feel no guilt as it is not your fault.

As Ive said before, we are not relationship counsellors but we do know about a gambling addiction. The decision is yours and we dont blame you.

I can say no more other than best wishes from everyone on the forum

 
Posted : 15th March 2020 12:09 pm
(@chanty)
Posts: 9
Topic starter
 

Thank you everyone for your kind comments. It wasn’t an easy decision but it was months in the coming & I had given him so so many  chances and he had blown every one of them and still didn’t seem ready to completely quit. The poker was getting progressively worse- he couldn’t even manage to hold onto his money for 24 hours. I only found out after a text message alert from his bank showed up on his mobile that he had 17p left in his account after he had only just received money the day before. I was scared for where this was going. I do feel such a relief now he’s gone & I can just concentrate on the baby 🙂

 
Posted : 16th March 2020 8:41 am
(@chanty)
Posts: 9
Topic starter
 

He has just started some counselling and I wish him the best with it. Maybe if he is ever better in the future we might be a couple again but  he needs to focus on sorting himself out, finding a job and taking some financial responsibility for his daughter before that will ever happen. 
I feel so much calmer now - especially that I don’t have to watch him wasting his money on online poker.

 
Posted : 16th March 2020 8:46 am
Joydivider
(@joydivider)
Posts: 2156
 

Yes you see living with a gambler would have given you no stability or security.

Ive been a problem gambler and I would never live with a gambler never mind a problem gambler.

You would never know if there was any money left or if you still had some possessions. You would never know if the roof over your head was secure or if the bailiffs were coming for secretive debts.

Its no way to live especially with a baby. I feel for you...he has a drug addiction but whatever your feelings for him you can never be complacent again. Im afraid that you will have to manage all the money if you do give him a second chance in the future.

He should now see what gambling has cost him. Its costing him everything and it will completely destroy him. Its up to him to seek help for an addiction which controls him over everything else 

This is happening to couples on a daily basis. Gambling deregulation is a national scandal and the problem is going exponential

Best wishes

 
Posted : 16th March 2020 10:25 am

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