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Dont know where to turn?



My husband is a gambler and admits it.  I thought he had stopped but he has had a drink tonight and broken down telling me he never stopped. He has a lot of debt but he won't tell me how much. 

We are struggling to pay all the bills without using our overdraft. 

He is feeling depressed about it and saying he might aswell not be here. 

He is a proud man and I can't see him going to groups but something needs to be done otherwise its going to get out of hand more than it already is.  Any suggestions where I can turn for help for his gambling and the debt. I'm summising the debt is probably over 20k

Topic starter Posted : 15th January 2022 12:55 am

Hello and welcome to the forum. You are not alone. There are lots of people here who can relate to your situation. 

It's important that you look after your own wellbeing as living with a gambler can really take it's toll. The advisers on here can offer help and support should you want to call them or there is an option to message them if you prefer. There is access to counselling for both of you if either of you would find it helpful.

There are steps that your husband can take such as using blocking software, or self excluding from bookies, depending on how he gambles. The real issue is that he has to really WANT to stop. You can't do it for him.

Take care and keep posting. There will always be people here who are happy to listen and  support.

This post was modified 6 months ago by Jess27
Posted : 15th January 2022 1:05 pm

There is a debt advice charity called Stepchange which I know has helped a lot of forum users.  


Posted : 15th January 2022 1:09 pm

@jess27 i don't suppose you know how legit they are!? I've just called them but now i'm panicking lol. 

Posted : 18th January 2022 11:23 am

Hi @BeckyL89

I've never dealt with them myself but I know lots of users on here have found Stepchange really helpful and the forum advisers recommend them so I am sure they are ok. They are a registered charity I think.

Hope things work out for you. 


Posted : 18th January 2022 11:56 am

Sorry you are in this position. It’s a horrible place to be. GamCare have lots of good resources and courses that people can put them self on. May be an idea if your partner is willing to go to the doctor as well. And make sure that you have support to lean on as well.

Iv used step change before and they were brilliant. Went though all our finances and gave me really good impartial advice. 

Hope you are both ok 

Posted : 18th January 2022 10:55 pm

It's terrible. I think that your husband is lucky to have you because you are worried about him. Just talk to him and agree to go to therapy together. In addition, you need to help him block all the cards and manage his finances. Although I think that he can be allowed to play games for free, such as in live odds comparison. It's really hard to give up. In fact, many of us drink alcoholic beverages or eat sugar in moderation. Your husband must learn to control himself.

This post was modified 6 months ago by terrysmith
Posted : 19th January 2022 12:00 pm
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