Advice please

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(@amylou)
Posts: 2
Topic starter
 

So I've been with my partner for nearly 5 years, 3 years ago I found out he has a gambling addiction. He stole every penny for my bank for months, I changed banks numerous times and told the bank everything. I ended up getting into debt as I couldnt pay to live. However, still to this day my partner is gambling everything he can get his hands on, he is borrowing money from anyone who will lend him it but is betting it away and can't pay them back. I have told family to not let him borrow and I've begging him to get help. We have 2 children and from everything that has happened I'm struggling with depression. He won't get help and in his mind he's not doing anything wrong. I love this man more than words can say and would do anything for him to get help. I can't carry on like this and I don't know what else to do. I have said multiple times that I can't carry on however he has no where to go and refuses to leave, he gets extremely angry regarding the supject and because of my children I try to push it to the back of my mind so we don't argue. I can't cope anymore. If anyone has any advice please

 
Posted : 25th February 2020 7:59 pm
Forum admin
(@forum-admin)
Posts: 5946
Admin
 

Hello Amy

I am so sorry to hear that things are so tough and have been for a long time. Please do contact he HelpLine 0808 8020 133 or the NetLine, so you can talk about how you are feeling and get support for what you are going through. As someone who is being affected by someone else's gambling there is lots of help on offer including free one to one support if that would be helpful. As I am sure you are aware, it is really important to protect yourself and your children in this difficult situation, so please do reach out for support and find out how we can help you with this. 

You may also want to check out gamanon.org.uk  the sister organisation of Gamblers Anonymous, it's a support group run by and for people who are affected by someone else's gambling.

I wish you all the best with your situation

Cal

Forum Admin

 
Posted : 25th February 2020 11:22 pm
brownie889
(@brownie889)
Posts: 106
 

Hi Amy 

Sadly I don't think things will improve for you unless he wants to admit he has a problem and needs help. He also can't keep physically or emotionally bullying you in this manner. I think you need to get some real advise from trained professionals and maybe talk to your family around you. Gambling is a torrid addiction that splits people and alot of people myself included dont admit they have a problem. I often say you can only help people that want to be helped. I really hope you manage to get through to him and he sees everything he could lose.

 

Stay strong x

 
Posted : 26th February 2020 7:15 pm
(@amylou)
Posts: 2
Topic starter
 

Thankyou, I'm getting professional help and trying to stay positive through this difficult time. I'm so happy gamcare exists! Xx

 
Posted : 26th February 2020 8:10 pm
S.A
 S.A
(@s-687)
Posts: 4883
 

Hi Amy... glad to read that you are getting your own talking support. I hope it helps you to find your way forward. I must admit, having been reading these forums for years, I still don't understand how anyone can still love someone despite being treated so shockingly badly.

Anyway, all the best

 
Posted : 29th February 2020 9:31 am

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