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Posted on:
Wed, 05/04/2017 - 12:32

ODAAT

Joined:
2014-11-10

J - Jovial

One of my better personas that occasionally comes out to play these days.

Posted on:
Wed, 05/04/2017 - 13:39

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

More fab 'Js'!

Posted on:
Wed, 05/04/2017 - 13:58

Julie 35

Joined:
2016-11-18

J is for Julie-

But for the purpose of this, J is for Jolly

Posted on:
Wed, 05/04/2017 - 16:21

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Thank you Julie!

Posted on:
Wed, 05/04/2017 - 21:59

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

I felt I had things to offer after a year + of not gambling. I don't. I'm coming off tranquillisers, have a multitude of issues in my personal life which my wife and I are addressing as a team. The A-Z has been my way and thanks for all the contributions to chill out but I'm not. As I said in the chatroom, I want to work out how to be OK and offer real support to other people. Thanks for all the support I've had friends. Phil x

Posted on:
Wed, 05/04/2017 - 23:04

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

J is for July; keep GF and summer looks brighter with a better chance of holidays and/or spending money to enjoy this sunny month! 

Posted on:
Thu, 06/04/2017 - 10:54

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Nice Mixer - quirky!

K - Kinship with fellow recovering CGs.

Posted on:
Thu, 06/04/2017 - 22:38

ODAAT

Joined:
2014-11-10

K: Kindness

To ourselves as well as others

Posted on:
Fri, 07/04/2017 - 01:31

ODAAT

Joined:
2014-11-10

L: Laughter

with others & @ myself sometimes but I'll take it in any form recovery wants to provide it

Posted on:
Fri, 07/04/2017 - 11:21

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

L - learning...everyday

Posted on:
Fri, 07/04/2017 - 11:41

Our Lady

Joined:
2017-02-21

L = Laughter.  Learning to laugh again when we are g.f, so beats those stomach wrenching feelings and look of sheer dread and anxiety etched firmly on our faces.

Have a "LOVELY" g.f weekend all.

Our Lady 

Posted on:
Fri, 07/04/2017 - 11:46

Our Lady

Joined:
2017-02-21

 

 

 

Oops!  Just realised we have already had laughter!!

L - Live and learn.  Something we are all striving for on here!

Our Lady 

 

Posted on:
Fri, 07/04/2017 - 12:17

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Thanks Our Lady. Hope you have a good weekend as well. Lovely weather "predicted"!

Posted on:
Fri, 07/04/2017 - 12:19

Sillycow

Joined:
2016-12-09

L - live and let live

Tolerance and understanding for others.

Mari x

Posted on:
Fri, 07/04/2017 - 12:29

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Which I am still learning Mari. Thank you x

Posted on:
Fri, 07/04/2017 - 21:29

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

It was a good chatroom tonight in my opinion. A couple of people who hadn't used the room before looking for advice/information. A pity more experienced CGs than me were not there but good all the same. Best wishes, Phil

Posted on:
Sat, 08/04/2017 - 07:39

ODAAT

Joined:
2014-11-10

M: Manageable

I'm putting this out there as [email protected] put it to me: not mistaking manageable for plate spinning

Posted on:
Sat, 08/04/2017 - 10:22

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Thanks guys. Not flippant but M - Money. Not the be all and end all but seeing your debts go down and being better off is a good feeling.

Posted on:
Sat, 08/04/2017 - 10:27

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Again, I don't want to sabotage anyone else's thread but having just read the story of the return to gambling after 400 days abstinence I just thought that is "bonkers". Absolutely insane. I found it very disturbing, very serious and pretty scary.

Posted on:
Sat, 08/04/2017 - 12:23

Sillycow

Joined:
2016-12-09

M - Me...I am responsible for my own actions/choices.

Mari x

Posted on:
Sun, 09/04/2017 - 11:50

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Common sense prevailed - thank you.

 

Posted on:
Sun, 09/04/2017 - 11:52

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

N - non-complacency

Posted on:
Sun, 09/04/2017 - 11:56

volcano

Joined:
2010-07-05

O= Orgasmic!

The elation of A) Realising that we're not alone & B) Realising that we can overcome this asiduos behaviour

Posted on:
Sun, 09/04/2017 - 11:58

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Thank you V - made me smile but unfortunately O is tomorrow - I made the same mistake myself and re-edited my post!!

 

Posted on:
Sun, 09/04/2017 - 12:02

volcano

Joined:
2010-07-05

Whoops........

Ok -

N = No chicken curries!

A lil cockney slang, ' discovery ' helps to disperse our needless inhuman worries of our nexr lie or punt etc

Posted on:
Sun, 09/04/2017 - 12:08

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Thanks for the contributions!

Posted on:
Sun, 09/04/2017 - 12:21

ODAAT

Joined:
2014-11-10

O is for Ohhh (V) but of course, that it 2moro so

N: Noticing

what beauty there is around us.

Posted on:
Sun, 09/04/2017 - 12:34

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Lovely and I shall be going out into the sunshine in a bit. Yesterday was strange - I wasn't at all bothered about the GN but only a few weeks ago I was really bothered about the Gold Cup. Not a question of wanting to gamble but having horrible "intrusive" thoughts.

Posted on:
Sun, 09/04/2017 - 16:24

Our Lady

Joined:
2017-02-21

N = New - goals, aspirations, dreams.....

Our Lady 

Posted on:
Sun, 09/04/2017 - 16:54

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Thank you Our Lady

Posted on:
Mon, 10/04/2017 - 11:15

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

O IS today! O - openness.

Posted on:
Mon, 10/04/2017 - 12:03

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Cool!

Posted on:
Mon, 10/04/2017 - 12:11

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Dear Diary: I actually think I am quite a nice and sincere person but I do have a temper and sometimes I've "bitten" in real life and virtually which I always end up regretting. I expressed a few posts back where I feel I am at and how far I am from where I would like to be. I worry that if I don't find that path I'll find something else to get fixated on to distract me FROM me just like I did with gambling. I've had some therapy but I've never come to terms with specific events in my early life. I don't know if I ever will. I have fleeting moments of happiness within myself (relationships a different matter as I have a lovely wife and great small circle of friends) and laugh quite often. Obviously I'm happier than when I was gambling compulsively which I deal with in with in my own way (and no I'm not just talking about self-exclusion) daily but I'm also thinking of the long-term. A self-absorbed post but then what are diaries for?!! Best wishes, Phil

Posted on:
Mon, 10/04/2017 - 16:18

ODAAT

Joined:
2014-11-10

Struggling with the O so the NM has stepped up with:

O: Omazing :-0  I despair!

My contribution for today is,

O: Open

something I can be now I'm not tripping over my own lies.

Posted on:
Mon, 10/04/2017 - 16:29

[email protected]

Joined:
2014-12-31

. Good game.
Omniscient. Something i realise im not since stopping gambling.

Posted on:
Mon, 10/04/2017 - 17:20

volcano

Joined:
2010-07-05

...... wrote:
C'mon V, don't be shy now :-)))))

O - Opportunities

When life unfold in front of us & opportunities arise without the fog of addiction.

Came to quick yesterday Sandra..

O - omnipotent.

How I tend/ use to view ga

Posted on:
Mon, 10/04/2017 - 17:41

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Thanks for the words although I had to look up Dan's! :-)

Posted on:
Mon, 10/04/2017 - 20:27

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

It is good to learn new words and also internet terminoligy you are not familiar with. So many different terms and expressions I still keep on learning despite having been online for 20ish years. Best wishes and thanks, Phil.

Posted on:
Tue, 11/04/2017 - 10:06

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

P - perseverance

Posted on:
Tue, 11/04/2017 - 10:11

Our Lady

Joined:
2017-02-21

P = Present - it's important for us people on here to try to live in the present, the here and now.  Let go of the past and try not to think too far ahead but for now, just be and concentrate on today.

Take care all.

Our Lady 

Posted on:
Tue, 11/04/2017 - 10:31

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Thanks for the contributions.

Posted on:
Tue, 11/04/2017 - 12:16

Markman

Joined:
2011-12-14

Morning Phil,

Hope all is well on the sans gambling front!

Not sure what happened last night. Think I got mixed up in something that did not concern me, although I still think all got blown out of proportion.

Not sure Chat is for me after last nights episode. Thought it would be a nice place to have a laugh with like minded people, perhaps even an opportunity to talk about something other than the obvious!

Anyway, really hope all is going well with you.

Take care

Mark

Posted on:
Tue, 11/04/2017 - 12:31

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Hi Markman. Thanks for your message. Please read the thread I have started on the debates and discussions section as I deliberately started it there to clarify my view on last night. Please don't be put off using the chatroom - as you saw between 7-8 it can be a very positive environment with like-minded people and sometimes it can be like a scene from Gladiator but generally not. I realised recently that some people do use it for social reasons as well as gambling abstinance and that is fine. I re-iterate please don't be put off by last night - I am sure you have a lot to offer in chat and in the forum generally. Best wishes, Phil

Posted on:
Tue, 11/04/2017 - 12:49

ODAAT

Joined:
2014-11-10

P: Painful

@ times - especially when you've thought one way for years & now see the folly in it.  One of my hardest things has been identifying in myself behaviours that I detest in others...No one wants to be a two faced farm animal.

Posted on:
Tue, 11/04/2017 - 20:55

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Good evening. Honesty is part of recovery and despite my initial reservations about this diary entry and slight resentment after being the one contacting admin about last night's chatroom - I am not allowed to use the chatroom for two weeks which was explained to me in an e-mail from GamCare and my posts will be moderated for how long I am not sure. I respect the decision although it is a bitter pill I have to swallow - as have others - and will but I genuinely did not mean any provocation last night. I am very upset but accept the decision and will have two weeks to reflect on my behaviour so no snotty/personal responses please. I will continue to post here and elsewhere and try to provide support in my own clumsy way and try to stay bet-free. Best wishes, Phil.

Posted on:
Wed, 12/04/2017 - 10:27

Our Lady

Joined:
2017-02-21

Q = Quiet - It is good to have some quiet time to ourselves, to reflect, to chill and to breath!

Posted on:
Wed, 12/04/2017 - 10:39

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Quizzical (spelling?) about being short-term, medium-term and long-term bet-free. Thanks for the contributions!

 

Posted on:
Wed, 12/04/2017 - 11:20

Rhoda

Joined:
2016-12-06

Quiescence....definition says quietness and inactivity, but not quite what I thought...was thinking more of a state of active quietness....being able to listen to ones own internal voice and not fleeing to gambling, and being able to actively and quietly listen to the joy and pain of others, allowing them space to express their feelings.

Posted on:
Wed, 12/04/2017 - 11:30

Phil72

Joined:
2016-10-07

Great word Rhoda - never heard of it before but very pertient to my life currently. Best wishes, Phil.

Posted on:
Wed, 12/04/2017 - 13:36

GirlJ

Joined:
2015-03-05

Quash - what I hope to be able to do to this vile addiction :P

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