Is it possible for a CG to 'control' their gambling?

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Sam Crow
(@sam-crow)
Posts: 552
Topic starter
 

Just as the question states is it possible for a compulsive gambler to control their gambling?

In my opinion no, it's not. I have tried this countless times over the years. Abstained altogether for months and sometimes years only to tell myself "sure a fiver bet on the football will do no harm". Of course eventually that innocuous £5 turns into 10 then 20 and so on. Sometimes it takes months or even a year to get to the crazy stuff but it always ends the same. A clue is in the title - Compulsive gambler. I can convince myself I can control it if I want to but the truth is why would I want to be a 'controlled' loser?

At times I do envy those who can go and do their couple of bets a week and be happy win or lose and leave it at that. I'm not one of those people - I tried to be over the years but it didn't work for good reason.

So what's everyone's thoughts?

 
Posted : 22nd November 2016 4:46 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

Absolutely not for me on the fruities but I'm going to chuck something controversial into this because I'm not whiter than white & I don't want people to think I am hiding it, I still do the lottery. I don't do it regularly, I think twice about buying the odd scratchcard but yes, I still do both from time to time as I do when stuff comes round @ work be it charity based or not. Strangely, although I never had any real interest in this before, when I 1st quit, it became a huge focal point for my urges (it was the open door), now I can take it or leave it again. It has been suggested that I just 'leave it' then because what does it give me but it gives me a sense of normal. I'd happily gamble with the minuscule interest rate that savings could make against putting my money into premium bonds but I take that risk so why not the lottery, for me!

 
Posted : 22nd November 2016 5:29 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

Hi Sam , For me personally , I know I could never control it and even if I felt I could it wouldn't be worth the risk TBH , I've tried in thhe past to change betting patterns, cut down stakes and even just trying to stay out for a few day's or a week and none of them worked and usually ended up much worse with stakes once again being increased because my gambling brain was justifying it by saying " Well youv'e had aweek off and been good so why not " ? .

I know I could never safely go back there which only annoy's me when I think of family day's at a racecourse or a night at the dogs but I accept that's the way it has to be and those occasional day's out are a small price to pay for being at peace with myself after many years of turmoil :)).

 
Posted : 22nd November 2016 5:41 pm
cardhue
(@cardhue)
Posts: 839
 

ODAAT - Thinking of what you wrote. This is not a dig at you and I appreciate your frankness, but can you say with certainty you have broken addiction if you still do the lottery?*

I appreciate the lottery is far removed from FMs, in terms of instant gratification (or any gratification - scratch cards less so!!)

I suppose there's the paradox of - if it's so removed from our poison, and so inconsequential, why can't we let it go too?

Could it in fact be our addicted mind, in a very cunning 'rationalising' disguise, telling us not to let go?

* not entirely sure what 'breaking addiction' means, but hopefully you get the jist

Best

Louis

 
Posted : 23rd November 2016 10:40 am
triangle
(@triangle)
Posts: 3242
 

cardhue wrote: ODAAT - Thinking of what you wrote. This is not a dig at you and I appreciate your frankness, but can you say with certainty you have broken addiction if you still do the lottery?* I appreciate the lottery is far removed from FMs, in terms of instant gratification (or any gratification - scratch cards less so!!) I suppose there's the paradox of - if it's so removed from our poison, and so inconsequential, why can't we let it go too? Could it in fact be our addicted mind, in a very cunning 'rationalising' disguise, telling us not to let go? * not entirely sure what 'breaking addiction' means, but hopefully you get the jist Best Louis

That's very familiar Louis. Its the thought running around my head. It would be so easy to continue betting my way. Whats the harm? Maybe I could get away with it i guess? It just depends on how progressively ill i am.

today I remind myself I can't place the first bet like many do. Maybe i get another chance at recovery, but i didn't like I would after the last suicide attempt. Do I risk it?

 
Posted : 23rd November 2016 11:42 am
alainepo
(@alainepo)
Posts: 363
 

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Posted : 23rd November 2016 4:31 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

I think that's half my battle, I still don't/won't/can't gra$P the concept of my addiction. I still can't see that I was running from anything & know for certain if I had been able to 'play' machines with any degree of control I would never have stopped. The fabled 'action' gambler fits what I know best about myself & it's only by being here & asking questions of Dan that I have been able to both recognise & accept that there is generally & will be more to it for me.

Given the lack of instant & indeed questionably any gratification from the lottery & it's associated products I am comfortable (despite the urges I have previously experienced in regards to this) that I am no different to your average shopper who occasionally looks in their purse and sees a few quid & thinks why not. I don't know if it's a f you addiction you've taken enough or just me leaving a door open but I'm still figuring out this recovery lark & accept I am on the journey of my life. My addict brain sometimes suggests I could get myself back to Bingo, few games on the tables & I'd be able to walk straight past the machines but my real brain knows that that is bull. Maybe down the line I will be screaming @ the current me like I do @ other people now who think they can control their addiction by limiting deposits, maybe I'll be that alcoholic who's wife allowed him 1 pint a day? Either way, I'm working on a better me - ODAAT

 
Posted : 23rd November 2016 4:39 pm
alainepo
(@alainepo)
Posts: 363
 

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Posted : 23rd November 2016 5:06 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

I live in the knowledge that my next pound is my next relapse.
I can't control my gambaling my gambaling controls me..

So for me it's a no. But I wouldn't discriminate against anyone who can.

 
Posted : 23rd November 2016 9:20 pm
Loxxie
(@loxxie)
Posts: 1838
 

Online slots was my addiction. ..
Would I attempt " controlled play" on them now ?. ..
Nope !. ..I'm posative it would end in tears again...
I've always done the postcode lottery...but don't even think about it in the way I did the slots.
It's on a direct debit....so don't even really realise I'm doing it. .

 
Posted : 23rd November 2016 9:45 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

Hi I would say no to my addiction that was the online slots. Still early days for me at 57 gf but would never even wish to try it. I see it like it was to give up smoking after 30plus years, could not even have one because it would get me straight back there again and I'm never going to that dark, lonely place and hell hole called gambling addiction.

 
Posted : 23rd November 2016 10:10 pm
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

in reply to that question, i have a question of my own

'why would you want to control your gambling?'

its been 11 years since i was in the grip of a horrific addiction that robbed me of me! Since breaking free i have no desire to return to the 'old' me. in truth, i can say from the heart the old me no longer exists in any shape or form. Gambling is a non event now for me.

However, i can see why you might want to ask that question. Certainly, in the early days stopping playing online poker, and a night at the casino was something that i (thought i) enjoyed, and the thought of never ever gambling again filled me with sadness and regret. My head played games with me, and i imagined going back to the casino and having an exciting and fun filled evening while being on my 'best behaviour' and not going over the top with my betting.

now, i just think - meh!

What could an evening at the casino possibly do for me?

I dont tell myself that i MUST never go to the casino, in fact i think - if i wanted to go, i would go, but quite frankly i have no motivation and no desire. I still give myself that choice. i choose not to gamble. its not an effort, its not difficult, i am comfortable that gambling is not in my life. its my life, and i am now in control of my life. i prefer that to control over my gambling.

Why would i want to go to a soulless and lifeless environment where the sole focus and sole purpose is to empty my bank account?

Why would i want to spend an evening with people who have no interest in anything else but the next spin of the wheel or the next card to be turned over?

if i want a coffee or a coke or a sandwich then i can buy that for myself, and not have to be sitting at a blackjack table for my 'freebe'

The further i get from my addicted days, the less interest i have in gambling.

Controlled gambling - yuk, no thanks

love

rusty

xx

 
Posted : 24th November 2016 5:11 am
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

Impossible, I've tried countless times and like yourself think the odd bet won't harm but it soon steam rolls into ultimately a big loss.

I'd love counselling to be available, not sure if it is, or even hypnosis. It's so hard to shake off the CG.

 
Posted : 24th November 2016 8:12 am
(@Anonymous)
Posts: 0
 

I'd love counselling to be available, not sure if it is, or even hypnosis. It's so hard to shake off the CG.

Gamcare do ten free sessions of counselling Paul use the helpline to find out more.

All the best bud

 
Posted : 24th November 2016 11:22 am
day@atime
(@dayatime)
Posts: 1345
 

It appears controlled gambling is possible then. Lottery, scratchies etc. I didnt have a problem with sports betting, card schools or the stock market. Does this mean i can do those things? Sounds like fun

 
Posted : 25th November 2016 7:23 pm
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