Hello. I'm having strong addiction and it's still going strong. I'm playing all my wage every week. And just don't know how to hold my slelf back. I'm having 7k debt which is still growing . Lost my relationship . And I'm been into depression for over a year. I find it really hard to talk with somebody about this as I feel embarrassed. Sometimes feels that I just need to end my life. Might somebody can give some advice? Should I just block all my gambling accounts and start from there ?
Welcome to the GamCare forums. I am concerned to read that you have had depression for over a year and sometimes feel you should end your life. I would like to encourage you to see your GP for help with depression and should you have these feelings to try and talk, despite it being hard for you to do so. You can get in touch with one of our Advisors on our free HelpLine 0808 8020 133 between 8am and midnight each day, or use our live chat (the 'talk to someone' icon on the bottom left of our website page). If you need to talk to someone outside of the hours we operate, please do call the Samaritans on 116 123.
It is always a good idea to block gambling accounts, and we can advise on some more secure methods of going about this. If you live in mainland Britain and wish to access free 1 to 1 treatment for problem gambling this can be arranged. We understand that talking to people can be difficult and it is very isolating to be living with a problem gambling habit, and would like to encourage you to reach out for additional help and to not be alone with this.
Give them a call BK.
Then take a look around the forum and read a bunch of posts. Many of us are in the same situation as you....or have been at some point. We understand the lows, the embarrassment and the feeling of being at a complete loss.
Take some time to look around, get the blocks in place and things will improve. You've made a good start by being here, by being honest and by reaching out for support.
Not easy to stop gambling but easy to give up.
We cant...We are WARRIORS and we can do it. I believe in YOU...
What I have done 1st to stop gambling - self excluded myself for online gambling for 5 years.
Also im not allowed to visit any bet shops for the next 12 months ( 6 months left).
Went to my bank and cancel internet banking to not do any transactions online for example transfer money from credit cards or from my husband account to mine ( he cancel everything to).Told in my bank what problem I have got coz reason need to be given.
I was never gambling in bet shop but just in case I asked in my bank to destroy my bank card so if want any cash need to go and visit one of the branches.. I opened basic account where I have a card to pay out money from cash machine or do some shopping if need it but only 50.00 transfer every month.
Went to my GP for support but the only one thing what I get there was antidepressant tablets what tbh doesn't work on me...Get few helpline support but assessment thru phone is not what we expect and to be fair people who never was gambling in their life don't have a clue what we have in our mind...and how we feel.
Gamcare help me a lot...start with chat with someone from here...get a information about 1 to 1 sessions what I will go and also get info about GA meeting were I was 1st time yesterday...The best thing ever...
GA meeting help me a lot...was treated like part of the family there...You can tell there about you problem but you don't need to if u not ready...I was really stressed at the beginning coz I can see all eyes on me....also feel embarrassed that im there... crying when listen all people stories there...crying when talking about myself and what I have done to my family....after GA session I felt like I have done the best move what I can to go there and tbh I cant wait to go back there next week...missed people who know and understand what I have done , how I feel and what steps we need to take to get closer to normal life...Also happy to be here and support You if need it...Happy to see how people deal with it here and how their life changing day by day when GF...We will get there All , I know we will...We are all bad in someone story... we need to show them they are wrong...we are not bad...we are addicted and that's the big different...
I believe in You and I know You can do it...Go for it....1st baby step you have done coz you are here..
Proud of you...
Your wording feeling lost is a very healthy expression of how vulnerable I use to feel.
I use to think that gambling controlled my life.
By attending meetings I found that I was emotionally vulnerable long before I found my addictions and obsessions.
My addictions and obsessions indicated that I was emotionally vulnerable and use to escape from people life and situations I could not with emotionally.
I turned to addictions and obsessions when my levels of fear were very high and I use to go in to panic mode very quickly.
The recovery program for me was very scary at one time, now even today I attend at least two meetings per week.
When I am in the rooms of the recovery program I hear healthy and healthier people share how they cope with people life and situations.
The recovery program for me was and is today a place where like minded people who want to be healthier and have more clarity and focus in their life.
The money was just the fuel for my addiction.
I did not respect myself and I did not respect money.
I was unable to show appreciation and gratitude sincerely.
The recovery program helped me understand that I was not a bad dumb evil or stupid person, all I was was emotionally vulnerable and when I could not cope I would escape to my addictions and obsessions.
The recovery program which is non religious for me helped me to be able to abstain from my addiction one day at a time.
The recovery program helped me help myself get healthy once more, it helped me understand that I needed to heal my pains and no longer bury and suppress my feelings.
The recovery program helped me understand that like minded work together as a team finding the safest and healthiest way to deal with risky situations.
Each time I went back to gambling on several occasions I would understand more about what my emotional triggers were.
In the recovery program helped me to abstain from unhealthy habits.
The recovery program helped me to hand over all of my finances to a person I could trust because I could not trust myself with money.
So by attending recovery meetings not having large amounts of money on me I was able to heal the hurt inner child in me.
In time I would exchange my unhealthy habits in to healthy habits.
By attending meetings I would over come my fears and face them head on, as my fears reduced my trust grew.
Things I use to avoid facing I no longer fear today.
All the time and effort I put in to my recovery I am the beneficiary in being healthier today.
I am able to articulate myself in healthy ways.
I no longer beat myself up, I no longer hate myself, I no longer take risks that could harm me.
I understand that a healthy recovery is not about who is right wrong good or bad.
I understand that a healthy recovery is no longer doing or saying things that are unhealthy to me or other people.
My anger is very rare these days, my fears are reduced.
My daily lists of my needs, my wants and my goals are helping me stay focused on what is important in my life today.
Please keep going to meetings, you will benefit from it in so many ways.
Love and peace to every one.
AKA Dave of Beckenham
We've moved your thread from the Chatroom section to the 'New members' section of the forum, as that seemed more fitting.
How have you been doing this week?
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