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merlins

Member since:
14.02.2018

merlins's profile

I loved betting on sports and it almost destroyed my life. I am now looking forward to living a new and meaningful life and that life doesn't involve gambling.

I haven't gambled for

122

days

Date Post
24-06-2018 Day 122 I was in a low mood. I was sitting and ruminating about things I don't have or I have lost a…
23-06-2018 Day 121 These days I have a lot of urges and I almost forget why I stopped gambling and what gamblin…
22-06-2018 Day 120 Today, I reached four months period of gambling free. The last relapse was a nightmare and g…
20-06-2018 Day 118 World Cup is teasing me everyday. I am here alone in the room and can't move around like I u…
19-06-2018 Even though I am not gambling lately, I find it hard to be happy. Also, I am disabled now. I have be…
18-06-2018 Hi Fireboy,  My weakness is sports betting too. That's why I have tried to avoid watching NBA final…
16-06-2018 Day 114 For some careless mistake, I realized I lost 500 on something today. Even though it wasn't f…
15-06-2018 Day 113, World Cup games give me a great deal of urge. I try to watch the games but I started predic…
15-06-2018 To me, I wanna walk again. Due to my disability and surgery, I have not been able to walk for a whil…
14-06-2018 Thank you for coming by. The fight is inside me everyday. I love to sleep as much as I can and as lo…
14-06-2018 Day 112, So here I am again. broke, disabled and no girlfriend. I am finding it very hard to be moti…
09-06-2018 Day 107 Another NBA final game and another urge. I was thinking I would have bet on Warriors and won…
08-06-2018 Hi Louis, Thanks for the comment. I am dealing with depression at the same time with gambling proble…
07-06-2018 I keep posting in the forum whenever I have urges. It helps me, though. Since I joined this forum I …
07-06-2018 I just closed a NBA final game while watching because it gave me an urge to gamble. It was sport bet…
06-06-2018 Day 104 Today, there is a NBA final game. I automatically started calculating which team to bet on. …
05-06-2018 Day 103 The urge to gamble from yesterday is gone now. I was thinking about 14K that was lost during…
03-06-2018 Day 102 There is a NBA final game today and we also have baseball games. I am currently unable to go…
27-05-2018 Day 94 Sometimes, I could really use gambling when I feel totally lost. Sometimes I just don't know …
27-05-2018 Well done for over 800 days. I have been watching sports today and have some urge to put a bet. Howe…
26-05-2018 Day 93 I am watching Liverpool Vs. Real Madrid final. It is entertaining and keeps me occupied but i…
21-05-2018 Day 88 I have been isolating myself for a while. However, I exercise at home. Most of the time, my b…
20-05-2018 Day 87 I am right now in the car at a shopping mall parking lot. Thinking about all things I have lo…
19-05-2018 Thanks, jamdownunder. I will find myself some motivation to do something. Day 86, Some urge to gambl…
19-05-2018 Hi Samba 79, I feel your pain from gambling 10 plus years. Plus you need to take care of your family…
18-05-2018 It’s good that you are learning a new language instead of gambling. I guess I will find a similar …
18-05-2018 Hello Wilsy, I remember you often support me at my thread. Relapses happen. It’s okay. I think it …
18-05-2018 Day 85 Most of the time in my room.. not being able to do the regular activities with friends nor to…
13-05-2018 Day 80 Sometimes somehow, I can forgive myself for gambling. I can appreciate the times it kept me o…
13-05-2018 Day 80,  On the day like this, I really think it will be nice to be betting to forget all I am feel…
12-05-2018 Thank you, samba79. I read your thread and am sorry about last relapse happens. I also have some tho…
09-05-2018 Hi Richy244, I was reading your previous posts from the other threads. Depression, boredom, social a…
09-05-2018 Day 76 Most of the time, I am alone sitting, sleeping or going out to eat while I am a disabled. The…
05-05-2018 Day 72 I became a disable now. I cannot go to work for a few months. All the time being bored at hom…
29-04-2018 day 66 There is no single day that I don't feel depressed. It's not because I have debt or I am stil…
24-04-2018 41.Day 61 How do I get out of this dark cloud? I seem to be fine some days but I keep coming back in…
22-04-2018 Thanks, Henchie. Day 59, 59 days since my last gambling spree. It feels like a long time ago but I a…
16-04-2018 Day 53, My days of being motivated or having focus on something are on and off. Right now I want to …
15-04-2018 Day 52 I started today being depressed and ruminating about negative vibes. But I learnt slowly some…
13-04-2018 Day 50 Euro Championship League made me want to bet a bit. But I didn’t place a bet. 50 days gf is…
08-04-2018 Day 45 I was thinking this evening. About one and half months ago, I made a firmed decision to quit …
08-04-2018 Hi Pink, I just read your posts. I sympathize with your addiction and debts. I hope you find new hob…
07-04-2018 Day 44 I took an extra day off from work. I rest, sleep, exercise, and hang out. I feel more cheerfu…
06-04-2018 Day 43 I have to admit. Depression is still playing a major part in my everyday life. Someday I migh…
01-04-2018 Hi LML, I read your last post. It reminds me how I cleaned up my saving of two years in the last rel…
01-04-2018 Day 38 I have all the reasons to gamble again. Loneliness, heartache, broken, boredom. But I haven't…
31-03-2018 Day 37 I am working hard. At the same time, I have to remind myself not to get greedy on making mone…
30-03-2018 Day 36 and half I have been working hard these days to make extra money. In six months, there will b…
30-03-2018   Day 36 Today is payday and I checked my checking balance. For a split second, I wanted to gamble …
29-03-2018 Day 35 and half I am being able to avoid so much pain and trouble by not gambling while I am dealing…

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