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Cynical wife

Member since:
23.06.2015

Cynical wife's profile

Long term married, family growing up, last summer (2015) found out the hard way that my husband has been gambling for many years.

Date Post
17-12-2017 First time round, I did the thing about believing what my husband said and not looking too closely a…
11-12-2017 Hi, It doesn’t matter what he sees or doesn’t see. There’s a problem and if you treat it as a …
11-12-2017 Hi, Cathy, Thanks for your post. Sorry to hear that your son has relapsed. I did the same as you, th…
11-12-2017 Morning, Re you feeling responsible for his debt: it’s really important not to cushion addicts fro…
11-12-2017 I had four before I found out about the gambling!  Nothing to be said to stop your present situatio…
11-12-2017 Glad to hear that you’re making a start but if you read round the forum, will power alone doesn’…
10-12-2017 Finding someone else’s bank card or guessing someone else’s password isn’t a game, it’s a cr…
10-12-2017 Your anger is a signal to you that all is not well and it’s a signal that should be heeded. Surpre…
09-12-2017 Hi, I closed down all his accounts (starting with the ones in our childrens’ name that he’d abus…
03-12-2017 The addiction is the symptom of the underlying problem. Put another way, it highlights what’s alre…
03-12-2017 Hi, Merry, I started CoDA a few months as well as GamAnon and that’s opening up new insights. Don…
29-11-2017 Beware the trap of excess focus on what others are doing at the expense of focusing on what you need…
28-11-2017 Morning, Sorry to hear what’s happening, not a club that any of us want to join. It’s a terrible…
27-11-2017 Detach with love.  …
26-11-2017 There’s a saying about the road to hell being paved with good intentions? He awasn’t honest abou…
26-11-2017 Helpless, Not a helpful label for you. Indicates being a victim at the mercy of what everyone else d…
25-11-2017 Sound like denial / rationalisation / justification to me. You engaged in a gambling activity which …
25-11-2017 Definitely echo advice to focus on you and how you want to live your life. What you describe sounds …
23-11-2017 What are you going to do differently? It’s your actions that will change your situation, not your …
20-11-2017 Picking up on the family not being very understanding.  By compulsively gambling, you are causing e…
17-11-2017 You ended up like this because you want to do it your way and recovery is about surrender and admitt…
15-11-2017 Hi, I found out the hard way about my husband’s gambling and didn’t like it (actually it was dev…
13-11-2017 I get that the money is a big deal but it’s a symptom. Gambling doesn’t cause a new problem, it …
10-11-2017 Congratulations on the milestone, wish you many more. CW  …
10-11-2017 Morning, Sorry to hear that you’re struggling. A couple of thoughts. Projecting blame and minimisi…
07-11-2017 Hi, Bee, Welcome to the forum and you’ve come to the right place for cyber help. But it’s not a …
05-11-2017 Try the self assessment tool on this website and the Twenty Questions on the GA website. It will onl…
05-11-2017 How are you doing? CW …
05-11-2017 Morning, I would go further and question your perception of exactly what sort of a person your OH re…
05-11-2017 Morning, It sounds counterintuitive to leave him to it but it really is the best thing.  He’s an …
04-11-2017 You’re looking for the magic bullet that doesn’t exist: the secret formula for making an addict …
02-11-2017 Don’t self destruct, Sandra. CW …
01-11-2017 The banks didn’t clock my husband’s dealings with our children’s accounts. Worse, when I asked…
31-10-2017 Hi, GL, You can’t get your dad to do or refrain from doing anything. Same goes for your mum. Not b…
30-10-2017 Morning, WW, A few thoughts, to take or leave as you will. People with courage don’t lack fear but…
30-10-2017 Hi, JD, I don’t think it’s for anyone to get the advice through to a serial active gambler. It c…
29-10-2017 I am a wife who wasn’t told, my son inadvertently exposed his father’s gambling and the fallout …
27-10-2017 Hi, Emm, You’re in a relationship with a compulsive gambler, a person who has an addiction and iss…
26-10-2017 Hi, I find managing the finances a nuisance but better than the alternative. Feeling safe is importa…
24-10-2017 Hi, My husband is a CG, he’s been off for over two years but the damage was huge - and made a whol…
23-10-2017 Look on the Age UK website for advice for people with concerns about the welfare of an older person.…
22-10-2017 Hi, This isn’t about him, it’s about you. Your boundaries are yours, not his. Your problem is no…
16-10-2017 Do you see your biggest loss as financial? From my experience on the other side of the fence, financ…
15-10-2017 There’s nowhere else that you can possibly get breakfast apart from a gambling establishment?  No…
15-10-2017 Why on earth do you need to go into an “amusement” arcade and sit there, worrying about what oth…
11-10-2017 Morning, You can change you but you can’t change him.  No doubt this concept is not new to you, b…
09-10-2017 Hi, I’m not unsympathetic but in this situation it’s actions not words that changes things. Your…
08-10-2017 .Hi, I’m sorry to hear what’s happening but I just wonder if, like me, you’re losing yourself …
03-10-2017 If it’s your fault then it’s not his and therefore he doesn’t need to change. That’s his war…
03-10-2017 How are you? …

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