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What is your “blend”?

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#1 Posted on:
Sat, 10/03/2018 - 22:58

Areturntoabette...

Joined:
2016-09-18

Hello to all,

It’s great to see lots of people kicking the gambling habit/problem.  I’ve said numerous times that everyone has different factors in their recovery.  Not every person has the same strategy yet a lot of people are making it work. I’ve posted mine all over the place, what’s yours?

Over two years gf......main constants for me are honesty with wife and coming here every now and then for a read/post.  All initial blocks are gone now.  No K9 or money blocks but I still have the time/money/location triangle well and truely shattered.  What’s yours and has it changed down the line? 

Quite a few inspiring posts in the last few days. 

All the best,

Abet

Posted on:
Wed, 14/03/2018 - 17:43

Bamb84

Joined:
2018-02-13

Hi i know its early days 42 gf what has been working for me is i excluded from all sites straight away and have been watching box sets in the evenings when i used to play plus i have a book i have written all my debts in so i can see month to month improvement. I try and get out more now too. To be honest hitting rock bottom has made me realise and wake up i think you have to want to stop i really dont want this life anymore . I know as long as i never log on to one of those online sites ill be ok . I dont want to lose my family or home to that hell . Im so grateful i found this site reading all the stories and making a diary has helped me so much . Gl ev1 stay strong we can all beat this . Bambi

Posted on:
Thu, 15/03/2018 - 21:40

Areturntoabette...

Joined:
2016-09-18

Heya,

Thanks for taking the time to reply and sounds like what you are doing is brilliant and works for you.  I think on my post reading trawl I saw someone saying “you MUST go to GA” as if that is the only way to get help.  Another said “I watch YouTube videos of gambling and that helps” and then qualified it by saying it puts them off signing up.  I think the key thing is as you go further into your recovery things can and will change.  

A lot of people will ask “will I ever be normal again”? As I’ve stated my blocks have changed but not for the worse.  I feel normal with the knowledge that I can never gamble again. But then millions of people will go through life having never tried gambling so how am I different now knowing I never can gamble? I have no idea, losses over two years down the line don’t matter but the development physchologically is massive and means I have internal blocks to not gambling.  I never want to do it again and can confidentally say I never will.  It’s just musing but a big achievement for me was upgrading my computer and not putting K9 on as I feel I don’t need it.  Gambling adds don’t have the same effect and I’m almost conditioned to filter them out? 

I think initial blocks are very important but are they necessary for ever? I think a milestone is gambling is lightening the blocks and moving on without them.  Dangerous words maybe but for me it’s all good now.  Made me learn a lot about my ridiculous not caring and losing four figures without thinking self.......but now it’s all about different priorities and leaving gambling behind as a distant memory!

Take care all!

Abet

Posted on:
Sat, 17/03/2018 - 12:03

Joydivider

Joined:
2015-03-11

Yes my blend now is a Chai tea thanks :)

Its is an interesting recovery blend and adaptation of feelings but I am very solid and focused now. I have not renewed a self exclusion at the main arcade since 29/12 and that has been discussed as an interesting point this year. Its has been discussed as a test of my pride and willpower buts its a fact out in the open

I have a real dislike for the place in a calm way. Anger and hatred would only eat me up and is counter productive in recovery. I dislike the place, the staff and everything they stand for.this years thing has been not wanting to go in again even to renew.

The strong realistation that they only hurt me is very clear now. I dont see and benefits to places like that and wonder why I ever did. I feel unclean even going near the door to renew but have had to analyse if that is any part of an addiction talking to me

We mention blends though and I am not complacent. as part of my ongoing monitoring process I have discussed this with family. The urges to go to anywhere local are not there now but I am well aware of possible out of the blue connections with the addiction.

A key point is that I have come to terms that it may always be within us with exceptional trigger points. That doesnt mean that I feel vunerable just realistic and confident now.

I wouldnt plonk myself in an arcade seaside town for example unless I was with people and we had clear aims of keeping busy doing other things. Actually I dont like such resorts so that is unlikely to happen anyway. Im well aware that bad news or depressive feelings bring out the worst in me.

Ive resolved that everybody really close to me who I trust knows I have had a gambling problem in the past. Not people at work or anybody who could use the information against me. All they would know is that I dont agree with gambling events

I fill my days with a plan and an aim. Gone are the days when I would wander out on a wet Tuesday night looking for company. Aimless  equals boredom equals possible problems

Will I ever be normal is the biggy? Recovery has granted me the serenity to say not really in terms of gambling but I am proud to accept that and deal with it. I dont have urges and I havent broken any of the blocks which are good signs.

I think the new members fear that it may be fighting urges for years but its not like that. I just know not to be complacent about it and keep my new standards up. I dont go near gambling dens even if invited on a works do. Obviously a trip to las vegas is pretty much out but I can joke about it now with ease.

Best wishes to everyone on the forum