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Time to quit for good

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#1 Posted on:
Sun, 26/11/2017 - 10:33

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Hi all, 

 

I am 27 , been gambling since i was 21 and have decided to really try and stop this addiction for good. 

 

I have been doing a lot of research on sports gambling lately and they say the biggest causes are depression, anxiety and boredom and unfortunately all three have been true with me the last few years. 

 

Not only is it the money i have lost but the time too, countless days where i would waste hours trying to chase money i had lost instead of making effort with the few friends and family i have. 

 

Have worked out this calendar year have lost £2,500 so far and would say i have lost that every year since 2011. So on average that is £208 a month, £52 a week, £7.50 a day.

 

I have suffered with anxiety and depression a lot the last few years so that leads me to spending a lot of time on my own which leads to boredom which leads to gambling. I want to stop this for good not only for the money but also to better life overall. 

 

I have self excluded from around 20 online sites but i know there are many more so to completely stop temptation have ordered a new bank card and girlfriend is going to scratch off the security number so i cannot use it, bit extreme some might think but i need to get used to life without gambling. 

 

I will check in here a few days per week updating how much i am saving per day by not gambling and hopefully that will help me stick with it. 

 

So here is to day 1 , 26/11/17 

 

Day 1 - £7.50

Posted on:
Sun, 26/11/2017 - 11:03

Moorey631986

Joined:
2016-09-08

Hi CM3003 and welcome to the forum! 

Many on this site can relate to the situation you’re in, me included, so you’re not alone mate. 

It’s a great idea to order yourself a new bank card and to scratch off the numbers on the back. 

It’s good that you’re girlfriend is with you every step of the way too. That’ll prove a massive help!

Good luck buddy and stay in touch. 

There’s several challenges you can sign up to on the ‘Overcoming problems’ section of the forum. 

Moorey

Posted on:
Sun, 26/11/2017 - 14:00

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Hi , thanks

Been with my girlfriend almost 3 years and this last week has been my second blip whilst with her,  lost £600 in two weeks after going 3 weeks without a bet, rather then lose every week i seem to lose between £200-£600 every 3 or 4 weeks and it always starts with me depositing only a tenner and chasing, i remember feeling annoyed being £40 down, oh how i wish i stopped then.

Just cant wait for my new bank card to arrive then i physically cannot bet and that should help me a lot to get used to life without gambling.

Will keep this updated to help me stick with it.

Posted on:
Sun, 26/11/2017 - 18:06

movingforward2017

Joined:
2017-11-06

Hi CM3

Your story has many similarities to my own. Seems like we both gamble for the escapism element yet when we are done we are left with nothing but regret and empty bank accounts. Why we constantly repeat these actions seems ridiculous but it’s because we are addicted to the process of gambling. I thought I had it under control but lost £150 over the course of this weekend after 22 days GF. Was up down up down on darts, the ashes, NBA. Seems like you also obsess over money like myself. We need to let this feeling go and enjoy life, our finances will build up naturally away from gambling. We deserve more than this, lets move on. Maybe take a read of my diary you never know there may be bits which help your recovery, I know yours has aided my fresh start today. I can say from the bottom of my heart that I don’t want to make this a cycle. This time I’ll be stronger, it’s simply not worth it. We must ask ourselves what gambling has provided to our life’s? Misery.

Posted on:
Sun, 26/11/2017 - 18:56

Josh280

Joined:
2017-11-17

Hi cm 

It seems to me all you want to do is stop losing. You mentioned it was only your second blip in 3 years but your various diaries suggests other wise.  

Tracking how much money you are saving isn’t going to bring about any form of recovery.   You need to put some actual effort in for that like ga, counselling anything really. Something is better than doing nothing.

You say you gamble because you are bored, or are you intentionally making yourself bored as an excuse to gamble?   

It’s not uncommon for most compulsive gamblers to become depressed ,  it’s most likely because you keep doing all your money every month and have no money to do anything else.  

If you put the same effort in as you do researching your bets then this should be a walk in the park.

Re read your various threads this is getting worse and worse there is plenty of help from other members in those threads.   

 

Posted on:
Sun, 26/11/2017 - 22:19

Tommyt124

Joined:
2017-09-27

Hiya cm I feel your pain pal its an awfull addiction people dont really understand it and I was in same boat being bored or thinking I was bored and gambling the little guy on my shoulder use to tell me to gamble have some fun but really I didnt need to bet I had loads of things to do rather than bet but because its all my brain knows its what I did .I have now been trying to change the way I think bu using g a and changing a lot of things in my life I have been rekindling my relationship with mrs spending time and money on my kids going football seeing friends never use to do it because to busy gambling hope you can make right changes and become gamble free good luck jft

Posted on:
Mon, 27/11/2017 - 08:05

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

It has just really taken over me last few years, mainly this year. 

Will now be able to focus on other things and put my attention elsewhere.

Lost of football coming up this month so will feel like wanting a bet but having this new card and not being able to deposit will help a lot. 

Day 2 - £15.00 

Posted on:
Tue, 28/11/2017 - 07:44

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

So far so good, no more thinking of gambling every hour of the day. 

Had a chat with my girlfriend yesterday and she said the last month i have been distant with her and at the time i didnt see it but now i have stopped i can see how it takes over me and i stop wanting to do things with her or make any effort. 

Now that i have stopped i have a lot more time on my hands to do more things with her and others.

Day 3: £22.50 

Posted on:
Wed, 29/11/2017 - 08:01

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

First day the football had been on since i quit. Usually i would spend all night glued to phone.

Didnt have the urge like i thought i would, just kept busy doing other things. 

Day 4 : £30.00 

Posted on:
Thu, 30/11/2017 - 08:10

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Getting used to not checking my phone everyday looking what to bet on, watched a game of football last night and was first time in a while didnt have urge to bet

Day 5 - £37.50

Posted on:
Fri, 01/12/2017 - 07:38

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Still going well, having less thoughts about gambling each day

Day 6 - £45.00

Posted on:
Fri, 01/12/2017 - 08:13

Moorey631986

Joined:
2016-09-08

I follow a similar tactic to you, whereby I also include how much money I WOULD have spent had I been gambling. Mine was around £20 a day. 

You’re doing well buddy, keep going. Almost a week now!

Posted on:
Fri, 01/12/2017 - 08:53

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Thanks, it might not work for everyone but it definately motivates me more not to give in. 

£2,500 a year isnt much compared to what some others have lost but its a lot to me when my salary is 23k. 

I have been spending that £2,500 each year for the past 6 years on gambling when i could have been making more effort going out more with friends and family and that is what i plan to do more of from now on. 

I thought i gambled because i was depressed but its the other way round i have suffered depression in the past because of all the gambling i have done during the last 6 years and really want to put a stop to it, its not worth it.

Posted on:
Sat, 02/12/2017 - 07:48

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

First Saturday since I started this, will be first time that i dont bet on the football in months.

Think i would give in if i hadnt ordered a new bank card but having that and knowing i cannot deposit helps a lot. 

Day 7 : £52.50

Posted on:
Sat, 02/12/2017 - 09:52

Muststop123

Joined:
2017-10-03

Well done CM3003, days and money saved are stacking up, stay GF this weekend.

Muststop123

Posted on:
Sat, 02/12/2017 - 12:29

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Thanks, going well. 

First time have kept a diary and it helps a lot. 

Posted on:
Sun, 03/12/2017 - 10:50

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Still no gambling :) 

Day 8 £60.00 

Posted on:
Sun, 03/12/2017 - 10:53

cg-rambler

Joined:
2017-11-21

Nice one mate! Every day feels a little bit better than the last!

Posted on:
Mon, 04/12/2017 - 09:00

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Thanks, getting used to it but still will update here as long as i remember to it helps a lot. 

Day 9 : £67.50

Posted on:
Tue, 05/12/2017 - 07:40

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

No urges lately, done quite a bit of reading on the addiction yesterday. Realised i have been addicted to the high of bet not caring a lot of the time if i win or lose so just keep telling myself not worth it.

Day 10: £75.00

Posted on:
Tue, 05/12/2017 - 19:55

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Quick entry as im watching the Man utd game having a few urges. 

Getting rid of my debit card has helped a lot, i cant possibly deposit online at the moment so only way of gambling is walking into a bookies which i havent done in months, i can stay clear of them it was just online access to gambling which was too easy. 

This week have spent some money on myself which i havent done in a long time, knowing that i am not wasting £200 a month anymore i feel like i can. 

Posted on:
Wed, 06/12/2017 - 08:23

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Day 11 : £82.50

Posted on:
Thu, 07/12/2017 - 08:06

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

A few weeks ago i wouldnt have been able to watch a game of football without thinking of having a bet every 10 minutes. Now i can watch a game and hardly think of gambling. 

Day 12 : £90.00

 

Posted on:
Thu, 07/12/2017 - 15:42

SEL87

Joined:
2017-10-18

Good man cm I had trouble with the football betting also,it feels so good now to be able to watch the footy and enjoy without having to sweat and stress about the result..well done on 12 days I found the 1st 3 weeks very difficult but now at nearly 7 weeks I'm fine!take it one day at time like your doing,you save so much from abstaining from gambling it's unreal.

Posted on:
Fri, 08/12/2017 - 07:57

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Thanks, its not just the money saved its being able to concentrate on other things like bettering yourself and making more effort with people rather then gambling taking over you. 

Day 13 : £97.50

Posted on:
Sat, 09/12/2017 - 08:54

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

 

Bit of an urge this morning , Saturday i feel will be the hardest day over the next few months, day off from work, all the football on. 

Will not give in tho , bit of xmas shopping this afternoon to keep busy 

Day 14 : £105.00

Posted on:
Sun, 10/12/2017 - 09:01

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Wasnt as bad as i thought it would be yesterday, morning urges went and was able to look at the scores without feeling the need for a bet. 

Day 15 : £112.50

Posted on:
Mon, 11/12/2017 - 07:48

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Weekend gamble free :) 

Seeing the savings go up each day and reading about why we gamble understanding how it is not worth it is helping a lot 

Day 16 : £120.00

Posted on:
Tue, 12/12/2017 - 09:07

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Day 17 : £127.50

Posted on:
Tue, 12/12/2017 - 10:35

Equinox

Joined:
2017-10-18

Hi CM3003 - Well done - it's really good to see the days and the money clocking up. Glad your urges went and you were able to enjoy the football. Life does seem less burdened without the constant thoughts about gambling.

All the best

Equinox

Posted on:
Tue, 12/12/2017 - 15:06

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Thanks Equinox, 

£2,500 a year isnt a lot to some and is not a lot compared to some of the stories have read on here but its 10% of my salary and im not saying i will save that £2,500 a year if i manage to stop but i will at least be able to save half of it and spend the rest on myself instead of throwing it away to the bookies.

Up until i started this thread a few weeks ago i lost all value of money, i would go shopping and not buy myself something because it seemed a lot to me at the time but i would then go and lose £200 the next day gambling without realising what i was doing until it is too late. 

The main thing for me in quitting is having a normal life back and not letting gambling rule my life in so many ways, its not the money lost which i regret the most its the days and weeks wasted.

Posted on:
Tue, 12/12/2017 - 15:39

mattick

Joined:
2017-04-16

Hi CM3003

Well done on your jouney to a gamble free life.  Read some of your posts, yeah £2,500 a year may not seem like a lot in comparison to others.  But you could of easily ended up lossing a lot more, going into debt & losing a lot more than just finances.  Seen it happen so many times.  Best wishes on your gamble free future, stay strong.    

Posted on:
Wed, 13/12/2017 - 09:22

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Hi Mattick,

Yes there has been many times where i almost lost it completely. The most i lost in a week was £1,000 and it could have been two or three if i hadnt stopped and thought about what i was doing. For me i havent lost money in the past gambling every week , it has been in chunks, i seem to be able to have it under control for around 6 weeks and then bang lose between £200 and £500 in a few days because of boredom.

This has been the first time i have started a diary and it has helped a lot, i also ordered a new debit card and my girlfriend scratched off the security code so there is no way of depositing online anymore which i always found too easy in the past. 

Day 18 : £135.00 

Posted on:
Thu, 14/12/2017 - 07:59

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Watched the football last few days and no urges. I keep saying to myself we cannot win, that in the long run whatever i do win i will only eventually give back so no point. 

Day 19 : £142.50 

Posted on:
Fri, 15/12/2017 - 07:57

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Bit of a win yesterday, Natwest refunded me £820 for overcharging me interest on a loan i took out with them in 2012.

If it had happend a month ago i would deffinately have thought i had some spare money to gamble with but havent even thought about it, put it straight into savings account. 

Day 20 : £150.00 

Posted on:
Fri, 15/12/2017 - 08:52

Equinox

Joined:
2017-10-18

Hi CM3003 - congrats on achieving day 20, plus winning the bonus Christmas gift from NatWest! 

Reading you post makes me appreciate just how much better it is to be gamble-free - because you're dead right, it would have been so easy to stick that money on a gamble which would have ulitmately resulted in it all being lost. 

Posted on:
Fri, 15/12/2017 - 09:10

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Thanks Equinox, it has come at a good time for sure,  didnt expect it so was a nice suprise. 

For anyone struggling, you can stop gambling, I am only on day 20 but its the first time i have gone this long without a gamble for 5 years and yes I could give in at any moment but it deffinately wont be for a while as I am not missing it at all, dont have any urges and am more focused on spending my time and money on more important things. 

Posted on:
Fri, 15/12/2017 - 18:48

mattick

Joined:
2017-04-16

You seem like similar to me CM3003 , can go ages without gambling than boom, soon as my eye is off the ball.  Well done on making it to 20 days.  I used to have a problem with online gambling a few years, didn't take too long to lose interest completely.  Hopefully be the same for you.

Posted on:
Sat, 16/12/2017 - 07:42

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Thanks, online gambling is just too easy to get carried away, always starts off with me depositing a tenner and if i get on a bad run them deposits turn into £50 then and a couple of times even £100 and i dont think of the deposits as real money, i would never gamble more then a tenner in cash in a bookie but online it doesnt seem real to me until ive lost it all and realise what i have done, i am just relieved to not be able to gamble online anymore. 

Day 21 : £157.50 

Posted on:
Sun, 17/12/2017 - 09:17

CM3003

Joined:
2015-03-27

Day 22 : £165.00