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Posted on:
Wed, 13/09/2017 - 10:53

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

Chartom - thanks for your comments. And here's a thought. Let's say you were walking down the street and ... found £20! You'd feel great, right. What would you do with it, in our clearer, brighter gambling free world...?   Then - imagine having lots of those £20 notes, that haven't been gambled, at the end of the week/month? And imagine this all being possible by simply saying, every day, "Just for today, I will not gamble". And then making it a reality.... as you're doing, day by day.

Abstainer - I share your memories being of a similar vintage to your good self. Good tmes indeed, before mobile phones, when we devoted all our attention to our friends and ... most importantly ... the good lady on our arm... very good times indeed :) !

Adam - like you I've been following the new Apple iPhone X release and can't believe the price point - £1000. Will this be Apple's moment of hubris? Just ridiculous and I think Apple will face a backlash. But, as you say, if you buy one, at least you've got something to show for the money, rather than shove it down the gutter, which is what we are doing in exchange for an hour or so of "enjoyment". Your point about 'rewiring' our brains is spot on - that's what we need to do, as it slowly sinks in that gambling is bad for us and we are free of it the moment we stop. And when we think of gambling, we should be heartened that we're free of it. And every day, we can be grateful, relieved and motivated that we've dodged the gambling misey 'bullet' for another day, because we will not gamble today.

*** Let's all be GF today everyone - we've got so much to gain! ****

Posted on:
Thu, 14/09/2017 - 08:16

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

 

Good morning!

I set the levels on this Challenge for good reason, and I would like to spend a moment looking at the STRIVER level - that's being 30 days gambling free in a row - which, co-incidentally, I've just reached and with our fellow team member, the determined Laurainthesky!

Whenever you hit 30 days, you are proving that you can stay gambling-free despite the tempation of extra availability of cash. Because, in 30 Days, you'll have received at least 4 wage packets (if you're paid weekly) or a salary (monthly).

That's what the STRIVER level acknowledges. Because, it has to be said, it's easy to stop gambling when you're skint.

But the STRIVER level acknowledges more than that; because even if you're skint, you might be inclined to do something even worse - and that's Borrow money, and get into (more) debt. And that's just plain disaster, as, sadly, many of us know to our cost.

Bring a STRIVER means more free money is coming in which can reduce the debt or add to savings, and/or spend it on real things to the benefit of you and your loved ones, who don't ask for or need this **** we put them through. 

STRIVER level knowledges the improved finances, but it's even MORE than that!

It proves stickability, the determination you need to really start to make a go of this. It means you are putting into place practical steps to help ensure a better chance of success. It shows character, real gumption in the face of adversity!

It shows you want a better life not just for you but your friends and loved ones. It shows respect, maturity, consideration and belief. And, incidentally, you'll feel better for doing it, despite the occasional pain of the cravings that will start to dissipate over time - more good news!

NEWBIES; are you ready to be a STRIVER? Step forward, and show our group you've got what it takes!

Meantime, just for today, let's not gamble. Just for today!

 

 

 

Posted on:
Fri, 15/09/2017 - 12:27

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

*** ARE SLOTS YOUR PROBLEM? ***

(My apologies if you've already seen this thread/video)

http://www.gamcare.org.uk/forum/view-if-your-slot-addict

If FOBTs (including roulette), or casino slots, or indeed pub slots are your 'poison' then the Youtube link from this thread is well worth a watch. It's about an hour long, and delves into the serious problems slots ("pokies") are causing in Australia. But more than that, it looks into how their addictiveness is being cynically harnessed by the gambling industry.

It will really make you think, and really make you consider whether you really want to continue piling misery onto yourself. It may remind you - it certainly reminds me - that, day by day, we don't have to do this. We can choose not to place a bet.

Although the video features the flashing lights of the games, believe me, it WON'T make you want to gamble.

Posted on:
Fri, 15/09/2017 - 20:12

antics

Joined:
2017-07-30

eye-opening doc. You really can't believe this industry isn't more heavily regulated when the creators of these games are freely admitting to creating the most optimal 'mousetrap' they can conceive, or the slots music composer state that he creates music with the sole purpose of distracting players from reality and negative thoughts they have about gambling. I appreciate their honesty yet can't understand how they sleep at night knowing full well what they're doing. 

Posted on:
Sat, 16/09/2017 - 19:01

4D

Joined:
2010-02-10

Hi Mixer, can I join the challenge thread please? I'm on 10 days gf :)

Posted on:
Sat, 16/09/2017 - 19:50

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

Hi 4D,

You are welcome to join us! You are showing, having hit double figures, an intention to be gambling free. I have read your diary from head to tail too: you're talking the talk and starting to walk the walk. 

I am personally looking forward to announcing you as a Striver in 20 days time. You can do this by simply reminding yourself, day by day, that you will be gambling free and, further, building the blocks you're putting in place to make sure you won't gamble.

You are going to be a solid, supportive member of our group 4D, but, most important of all, choose life rather than misery for YOU.

Welcome aboard :)

 

Posted on:
Sat, 16/09/2017 - 21:25

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

*** The One Word That Matters ***

I was watching a documentary about gangsters a while back. And, more recently, one about the Roughest Pubs in Britain. And, the other day, I watched a YouTube video about office politics.

(Maybe I watch too many programs/videos; but there we are!)

But my point is this: there was a thread running through this eclectic mix of proggies: one word - respect.

Respect is key in this life, if you have it, you avoid 99% of trouble. Handy if you are interacting with gangsters or patrons of particularly clicky pubs, and it will help you deal with and navigate all but the cr**piest bosses at work - sadly, though, there are quite a few of these; swerving them is the best trick here. (And if you are a c*** boss reading this - then shame on you.)

Respect is key in life. Treat others as you would like to be treated, that's the essence of it.

We all have our perceptions of others, and our pet theories of how best to proceed with a gambling free life.

Some swear by GA, others by counselling, others willpower alone, others via a myriad of different ways in combination or isolation.

Truth is, we're all different and one size doesn't fit all. The same applies to how we help others.

For some, a shout of  "pull yourself together!"  is just the thing to jolt someone into positive action. But for others, it would set them back - through temperament or simply how they're feeling, it isn't gong to help. 

So sometimes a little judgement is called for, respectful of that person's potential sensitivities.

I mention all this because it never hurts to remind myself that my sometimes straight-to-the-point approach isnt for everyone. It helps keep me in check. 

In short, it's about respect; if we respect others, it proves we respect ourselves. 

All good attributes in this gambling free journey to which we aspire. We're not just aiming for a better life, but being better people, too.

Posted on:
Sat, 16/09/2017 - 22:49

amt722

Joined:
2013-11-10

I have got to my first target and am continuing the fight. 30 days since I finally accepted the losses and admitted defeat to gambling. I have'nt gambled for 30 days, no urges because I'm done with it. Taking each day as it comes and doing it my own way.  I won't be going back to a life of misery.

Can I now be classed as being a 'STRIVER' please!

Can I just mention that the last 30 days I have read this thread on a daily basis and posted on the odd occasion. I know some disagree with the day counting and challenge theme's on the road through recovery. I believe we are all different and will find our own path to acheive the same goal we are all Striving for, a gamble free life. It gives  me focus and determination to acheive the gamble free status I am currently living. 

Mixer I commend you for this 'challenge' and am looking forward to day 100. That's me checking in on day 30. All the best 

Posted on:
Sun, 17/09/2017 - 02:03

Abstainer

Joined:
2017-05-10

Congratulations on your 31 days gf amt, good to see your positive and focussed. I'm with you as regards counting the days, it tells me how far I've come and I relish every gamble free day.

Enjoyed your last post Mixer. I agree it's important to show people respect, including ourselves.

Abstainer reporting in with 129 Days GF.....Yihaaa  Woohoo n Yabba dabba doooh

 

Posted on:
Sun, 17/09/2017 - 09:19

chartom3

Joined:
2015-03-11

Checking in 21 days gf , 10 more days untill i become a Striver and determind to get there , have my good and bad days but nothing compared to if i was still gambling, thanks to Mixer for the time spent running this challenge it does help to keep me on track.

Posted on:
Sun, 17/09/2017 - 11:40

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

** GURU CHALLENGE -  5th WEEKLY ROLLCALL!  ***

It's Sunday 17th September ... which means - time for a Rollcall! 

It’s mid-September, in normal circumstances a time when monies might be a little tight after paying off the excesses of the summer months… or, there might be a reasonable bit of cash free. This is normal life; reflecting back on a good summer and certainly not on our uppers. Now, all of our personal situations are vastly different; life may have thrown us good times and bad times, but nevertheless we would control life to a degree – the decision not to gamble.

Let’s contrast this to a life of gambling, or a life of continual relapses that, financially at least, still ‘count’ as continuous gambling – stuck in the gambling ‘rut’. Probably skint by now; with worsening debt perhaps; not a brilliant summer (things could have been so much better…). Possibly feeling c**p, guilty and having to hide what you’re doing from friends and loved ones. Self-loathing, being grumpy for the umpteenth time etc. etc. Same old, same old …

Why do I mention this? It’s simply a “backward glance’ to see how we’ve been in the past, and how it could have been. And, indeed, being gambling free, are living! It doesn’t hurt to remind ourselves from time-to-time what being gambling-free is all about. It’s about what we’re fighting for here. (And, for the avoidance of doubt, I have been personally stuck in the ‘gambling rut’ for too many years. So this reality check very much applies to me, too).

Let’s take a look at how we’ve all done this week. It’s been a mixed week – it’s not easy, this, but we can do it and as life gets better, the reasons why we are doing this get vindicated. We see the positive results for ourselves – and not just in our wallets or purses.

First of all, a warm welcome to our new members – 4D and Adam808; it’s great to have you join us.

And a ROLLCALL OF HONOUR goes to … Amt722, smashing through the STRIVER ribbon as part of our lifetime gambling free journey. It’s a very important milestone this, Amt722 – you are proving you mean this and we are delighted for you!

Here are the stats this week; and new from this week, I've hyperlinked all of our profiles!

GURUs

Phil72586 (days) – Heading for a big milestone here Phil, but as you reminded me in the Chatroom, your immediate target is 587 days.

ELDERs

Degenerate – 173 days – You have come to a new realisation and are sinking it in:  “I need to learn to accept I will never gamble again.”

Abstainer –  129 days – Every day, the power of song and lyric reminds you of what this gambling free journey is all about and the better life ahead if we take the right path. The lyrics also caution us to the perils of "fools gold"; far frm being "enjoyable", gambling actually leads us down a very perilous path indeed. The good news is, thanks to your sharing them with us, that we can all listen to this great music too! 

ItMatters – 107 days – Having elevated to Elder status last week, you still have your foot on the gas. You also hold the title of longest Gamcare username – an impressive 34 letters!

Sars27 107 days -  Likewise you’re keeping the pedal to the metal! There’s no let up to this; you must continue to live a better life, OK (wow, that seems… reasonable!)

Kadiz1106 days – You’ve gone quiet, Kadiz; no update since 25th August. Please let us know how you’re getting on. I’ve made you an ELDER, but will rest you if we don’t hear from you by next weekend. We all hope you’re OK.

STRIVERs

Mikey Nash – 68 – Haven’t heard from you for a while Mikey; please drop us a post! We’ll rest you next week otherwise but really hope you’re keeping Ok.

RubyBaby –  51 – Delighted to see you’ve hit the 50 day milestone Rubybaby; feelings of dread replaced with positivity. That is what it’s all about.

LaurainSky – 37  – We haven’t heard from you for a month, please get in touch if you can. It’s not easy being Gambling free and we will support you. We’ll rest you next week but we all hope you’re Ok.

Mixer 37  -  that’s me, keeping it going, one day at a life. Always remind myself every morning: do I want life, or misery? As simple as that..? No, I have solid blocks in place (my wife controls all the finances).

Amt722 – 31 – An absolute joy to welcome you into the hallowed ranks of STRIVERs. My goodness, looking around, you’re in some good company ;) . A very important milestone, this, Amy722. The journey has really started now. Day by day, you have proved you can do this.

NEWBIEs

Raj – 29 – Without fuss, you are on the cusp of being a STRIVER. You’re spirit and assistance to others on the forums is great to see, and testament to your own commitment. Looking forward to your promotion next weeks, as, day by day, you vow to be gambling free.

Antics – 28 – Looking forward to your elevation next week, too. I agree with your comments about the Australian slot (pokies) video and these games designers have a lot to answer for, if only they knew the misery they were helping to perpetuate. Keep going!

Adam80822  – Our NEWBIE newbie! Welcome Adam, and liking the cut of your jib. I sense your determination to be a STRIVER. Let’s see you get there; one day at a time.

Chartom3 – 21 Your quiet determination is noted, and a big test coming up if you’re paid monthly: payday. You can deal with this and really storm through the STRIVER milestone, always one day at a time.

4D11 - Welcome to our hardy gang! On 11 days, and glad you are wrapped up in our wonderful little gambling free world! Stay here, it’s the place to be. Welcome aboard!

Athena1991 – 10 – I know you’re struggling at the moment but you are back in the saddle once more. You are honest about how it’s going, and that’s really respected. Keeping plugging those gaps that are making you gambling. You have said you’re skint, which of course forces your non-gambling hand, but it’s a miserable time Athena. We want you to be happy

Loafin8  – Haven’t heard from you since the 3rsd Sept Loafin – we’ll rest you next week if we haven’t heard from you. We all hope you’re keeping Ok.

Xenedra – 4  – I know you’re finding it tough, too. Remind yourself, when you next get paid, to steer clear of the work PC. You will be storing up trouble … you know this. Again, you’re honest about your journey and you’ve got to keep plugging those gaps and seeking help and sup port.

Moorey  4 – Thank you for updating your status and I can see you’re on 4 days. I know you’re not finding this easy; don’t forget to post if that helps you. We’re here to listen, and help.

Sidney – 4 – I know you’re finding it tough but what you wrote earlier this week is spot on, to the effect of: we can’t win, because whatever we win, we give back and then lose more. Back in the saddle Sidney – there is only one choice here; life, not misery.

Conradnose - ??? - I'm not sure how many gambling-free days you've chalked up but in the absence of doubt have kept you in the NEWBIE ranks. Here's hoping you're Ok and would be great to know the latest from you and your blog.

Bornagain - I've rested you from our group for a while at your behest as per our Chatroom chat; just let me know if and when you'd like to rejoin us. Meantime - take care.

Let’s keep strong; keep sharing and let's remain, day by day, gambling free. There's no "choice" about this, really. Life, or misery? No contest :)

Mixer and Athena, your hosts for this challenge

 

Posted on:
Sun, 17/09/2017 - 18:14

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

*** NEWS UPDATE ***

Many of us will be aware of the news that FOBTs are going to be more regulated. Going gambling free, it makes little difference to us, we know that it's all about avoiding the next bet.

But it's at least good to know that there will be certain measures put in place to perhaps limit a new generation of compulsive gamblers coming on-stream. The changes will hopefully not just consider restricting the max bet to £2, but the speed of those bets - on slots, it would still be possible to lose hundreds of pounds an hour. The article acknowledges this. I would personally like to see jackpots capped at £100 instead of £500. 

But irrelevant to us as I say - one more bet is all it takes to get us back on the slippery slope. But at least the Gaming Commission is starting to bear its teeth.

 

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2017/sep/16/fixed-odds-betting-termi...

 

Posted on:
Sun, 17/09/2017 - 19:31

Sars27

Joined:
2017-06-02

Checking in 107 days GF !!!

Posted on:
Sun, 17/09/2017 - 19:43

degenerate

Joined:
2013-05-10

Checking in.

Amazing effort from Mixer updating this thread with the latest rollcall. Well done.

The link to the Guardian is no longer working. Seems interesting though.

Posted on:
Sun, 17/09/2017 - 20:14

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

Hi Degen and thank you for your kind comments. Hopefully, the link's fixed now :)

 

Posted on:
Sun, 17/09/2017 - 23:01

Abstainer

Joined:
2017-05-10

Congratulations Mixer on the Sunday Rollcall today . Absolutely brilliant, how you keep up to date with members progress is a complete mystery to me. You have a rare talent coupled with a caring disposition. Many thanks for the contribution your making to my recovery. Yours respectfully.   stephen

Posted on:
Sun, 17/09/2017 - 23:04

adam123

Joined:
2015-06-09

Hi mixer its Adam or route 66 is the aim (changed my name as I no longer wish to travel to Las Vegas as that would be a nightmare destination for me). Ive changed my name and would like to join the challenge and hope I can become a striver. I spent my savings that were for a holiday on Saturday night 117 pounds, went overdrawn and had to move my holiday money from another account so I wasn't overdrawn. This is another hurdle. I'm top of my poker league with two weeks left but instead of finnishing it off I'm going to start this new journey. I really cant trust myself in pubs with fruit machines in them so I will have to find new places to enjoy my spare time. Here's to a fresh start. Starting tomo

Posted on:
Mon, 18/09/2017 - 10:54

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

Abstainer - thank you, as always, for the kind words. I echo the same sentiment to you; you're helping yourself by helping others, not taking your eye off of your own personal journey and needs. The result is: Karma :)

Adam (next step): We've had many chats, Adam, and your bugbear has always been those pesky slots. I really can resonate with you, because I've been in your shoes. I was in a poker league at my local (Redtooth) and actually won the poker league one quarter, and attended the regionals. (I'd like to say I was knocked out by a bad beat, but, in truth, I went 'on tilt' very early on.)

My point is that before, during the break, and after the poker session I bombarded the slots and lost a fortune. Then I discovered the next day the 'tricksters' did the rounds and emptied all of the slot. I was filling the slots up, along with other mugs (because that's what we are) only for the professional slot machine emptiers to say - "thank you very much", and take the money. The same probably happens in your pub. You'll never win whenever you go on the slots; the tracksters have them tied up.

You are, partly due to the weekly poker sessions, feeding the gambling cycle, Adam, and you've got to put a stick through the spoke of the wheels of this cycle ride to misery. £117 of valuable spending money wasted on nothing. On top of the rest of it.

I know there's only two weeks to go and you're riding high in the league. Here's what you do. Annouce to everyone present at the next poker night (it'll be early/midweek, right) that you're not going to touch another slot. In fact, you'll give £10 to ANYONE who sees you gamble. That includes the bar staff. Make a fuss of it! You'll be ribbed, but - inside - you're very serious about it. Extend the offer to anyone who sees you gamble anywhere. An instant tenner for anyone who does! (You might be surprised at the number of people who quietly whisper in your ear: "Good on you, Adam ... you're doing a good thing keeping off those bandits, son")

Fact is, Adam, you could be extra sneaky and gamble somewhere else where no one can see you. But you'll be kidding yourself. How seriously disappointing that will be.

I know, like me you've been trying to stop for years but you're like a yo-yo, my friend, and it's time to take a fresh look at this. What fresh ideas do you have in mind?

Oh, and welcome to the Guru Challenge :)

All the best,

Mixer  

Posted on:
Mon, 18/09/2017 - 13:16

adam123

Joined:
2015-06-09

Yeah great idea mixer, ill do that tonight. I'm going to finish what I've started by going to the last two weeks of poker but ill tell everyone that is it ill go out on a high. If anyone sees me they get a tenner simple as.

Posted on:
Mon, 18/09/2017 - 20:39

Neveragain121016

Joined:
2011-10-04

Hi just wanted to drop in and say I really like the idea of this challenge. Love the levels. All the best. Stay strong all

Posted on:
Wed, 20/09/2017 - 21:39

adam808

Joined:
2017-08-27

Checking in here. Still going strong! 

Posted on:
Thu, 21/09/2017 - 04:53

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

Good morning fellow Guru Challengers! Yes, I really am writing this in the early hours;  I suffer from terrible insomnia, if anyone's got an advice; Indont want to take sleeping tablets but will consider herbal remedies; I don't want to add to my addictions (Well, recovering addiction, to be precise - gambling).

I'm on Day 41. Does it get easier? The way I look at it, every day, every reflective moment, is this: Do I want the rest of my life to be real, or misery? Do I want my loved ones to be tarnished with my misery 'brush'? Did they ask for it, or deserve it? 

Is life more boring without gambling? I used to think so to the extent if I planned a holiday and there wasn't a casino in proximity I'd get the shakes!! 

But I now know, older and wiser, I was mistaken. I just hadn't considered the options. Hadn't opened my eyes. 

It's not just doing different things, spending money on alternative things.

It's about what's right in front of us. All our senses, dulled by gambling and the actual soulless monotony of it, come alive.

We start to listen to others; and find them interesting. They renew an interest in us. Music sounds better. Food and drink taste better. What we see becomes clearer, brighter, more detailed. We stop to smell the roses. We consider. We care. Our imaginations reawaken. We become better people.

The rewards of being gambling free are many fold. We just need to take them. Or sink into a rut of our own making; don't blame anyone else. We know what they're up to, the gambling operators. There is help out there; we can all shape our destinies to a degree; that is, to steer them to a happier, non-gambling path.

Today, we will all be gambling free -NO excuses, right?

Ok, I'm going to TRY to sleep. A temporary price to pay, I rationalise. At least I'm not gambling. And I instantly relax at the thought. 

Posted on:
Thu, 21/09/2017 - 13:13

mark snb

Joined:
2017-09-20

I can see Robf's point of view. But I see the challenge for what it is - a mechanism to stay gamble free!!

Today is my second day and I would like to join too please. Strength in numbers I believe

Posted on:
Thu, 21/09/2017 - 13:51

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

You got it, Mark, this is all it is - a simple gambling free mechanism, one of many. If it helps, it helps. What concerned Robf were the names of the 'levels' (Gurus etc.). I re-affirm - and 99.99999999% of readers get this - you won't become a real Guru after 300 days.

You are welcome aboard and will be part of the next rollcall.

Posted on:
Thu, 21/09/2017 - 18:08

Abstainer

Joined:
2017-05-10

Well Mixer I am a little taken aback by the latest clarification of Guru status. Bit disappointed as I thought we automatically transferred to a cosy little spiritual retreat ! Some idyllic Ashram in the Himalayas to call my very own. Oh well, suppose i'll have to settle for GF in my council flat, but without the misery of gambling addiction it will still be like heaven to me. Abstainer the Elder on a mission to attain Guru status - let's do this.

Posted on:
Thu, 21/09/2017 - 21:59

Alantaylor1975

Joined:
2017-06-04

Hi everyone I would like to join your challenge. I have a severe gambling problem, started off fairly innocently 18 months ago and has quickly spiralled out of control. I have blew enough money to take my family on countless holidays. I self exclude myself from betting sites but after a few days I track down another site and open a new account. I know this challenge will give me something to focus on and a sense of achievement when I complete it. I HAVE placed my last ever bet today. Here's to the future and thank you for your time,

Posted on:
Fri, 22/09/2017 - 17:40

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

Hi Alan -  welcome aboard to the Challenge! I like your opening salvo - "I have placed my last ever bet today". Day by day, let's see you stick to that :) 

Great you're joining us!

Posted on:
Fri, 22/09/2017 - 17:44

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

Abstainer - it must have hit you like a bolt out of the blue to discover you wouldn't be a real Guru. Hopefully, you've had time to recover and adjust because I have to tell that you're not really an 'Elder', in the sense of being a leader or senior figure in a tribe or other group...... *** Mixer Ducks and Runs! ***

Posted on:
Sat, 23/09/2017 - 12:25

changemylife

Joined:
2016-11-02

Hi Mixer. I would like to express my thanks for your dedication and passion, both in your personal mission and with the tireless way you help others.

As Abstainer has said, it's amazing how you can keep track of so many members progress activities. And respond with zeal and connectivity.

I would love to be a part of this if I may. To be part of a positive group with a common goal is a vital addition to our armoury.

Regards, and all the best with your steadfast recovery.

Posted on:
Sat, 23/09/2017 - 19:01

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

Changemylife, welcome to the Challenge; great to have you on board. I know you mean this ... which makes your joining us even more special.

To anyone who thinks they hear voices in their head tempting them to gamble ... you do. Just ignore them. This video is interesting.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1o28A_qTFIo 

Hat Tip: I saw this on Smash'es diary. Great spot, Smash. 

Big Weekly Rollcall tomorrow !!!

 

Posted on:
Sat, 23/09/2017 - 21:59

changemylife

Joined:
2016-11-02

Thanks for posting this video link. The Justyn Rees Larcombe story brought a tear to my eye. Got to have utmost respect for someone who has lost everything and then fought to turn their life around for the better.

Posted on:
Sat, 23/09/2017 - 22:39

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

Yes, agreed, changemylife. An unforgettable TED's talk.

There are some amazing Youtube videos that really drive the message home to us addicts. 

As we know, just going to Youtube and searching for "stop gambling" puts us in the midst. Ignore the sh**ty slot channels obviously (mostly fake, dull and not worth the distraction). 

Posted on:
Sun, 24/09/2017 - 08:06

rubybaby123

Joined:
2017-07-31

Checking in 58 days gf today.

Hope your all having a good gf weekend xx

Posted on:
Sun, 24/09/2017 - 09:48

chartom3

Joined:
2015-03-11

Checking in 28 days  , have my ups & downs but glad to say still gamble free

Posted on:
Sun, 24/09/2017 - 10:37

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

*** Don't write a post like this, this month - please !!!!! ***

Morning All! And this is perhaps the most difficult time for us recovering gamblers on a salary - payday is approaching, or already arrived. Please, let's not buckle and have to write posts like this:

*** UPDATE: Just to make clear, the following "post" is completely fictitious, made up by me. Although it is one I could have written many, many times. It is provocative, I agree, but hopefully in a thoughtful, positive way. I apologise if anyone thought I had actually copied it from somewhere. I didn't - it is made up to help illustrate a point. changemylife - I hope this assuages  most of your concerns. Mixer. ***

(Scenario: written the day after payday:)

"There was an ad on telly/Facebook/the bookies/Instagram/Google/Youtube and I joined an online casino and gambled all my money yesterday. These gambling operators shouldn't be allowed to get away with it; it's their fault. I'm skint now, but will go gambling-free until I get paid again (but secretly know I can't gamble anyway because I'm skint, so going gambling-free is hardly difficult.) Life's boring without gambling - that's why I do it (but I secretly know a whole month with no money to spend is extremely boring and I'm dreading the next 30 days being skint). But I can borrow a bit more, and pay it all off when I get that 'big win' - it's a matter of time. I'm thinking I might put some block in place this month, but still think I can do this with determination alone. I'm feeling very determined having lost my wages today, I can tell you! (But I secretly know that without blocks or support I'll be writing exactly the same post next month.) But not to worry; at least here on Gamcare I'll get lots of sympathy every month. That makes me feel a bit better and re-affirms to me that it's not my fault. Still, only 31 days to payday; a bit of a long month, October, that's the downside."

Let's remember it's down to us and the actions we take to keep gambling free, day by day. Please, let's not, any of us, have to write a post like the fictitious one above this month. And I'm talking to me here too! Otherwise it will be the same next month. And the next month. 

Rollcall later...!

Posted on:
Sun, 24/09/2017 - 10:42

4D

Joined:
2010-02-10

4D checking in 18 days gf!
Thanks for adding me to the rollcall and all your work doing it :)

Posted on:
Sun, 24/09/2017 - 12:41

Abstainer

Joined:
2017-05-10

Abstainer the Elder on a mission. 136 days since my last bet and ain't no way i'm going back. No more da fool i'm gonna be cool.

Posted on:
Sun, 24/09/2017 - 14:02

Sars27

Joined:
2017-06-02

(Young )SARS checking in for 114 days GF ! 

P.S love your last entry about don't write like This @ mixer ! Once again you've hit the nail on the head :)

Posted on:
Sun, 24/09/2017 - 18:45

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

** GURU CHALLENGE -  6th WEEKLY ROLLCALL!  ***

It's Sunday 24th September ... which means - time for a Rollcall!

We welcome this weekend a trio of new members: Next Step To Be Free From This [Next Step], Changemylife and Mark SNB. As I’m fond of saying … “Welcome aboard!”

There’s no hiding place with this Challenge. All of our diaries are linked, we can all see how we’re doing, and if we go “off radar” (like I did early in the year; “guilty as charged”), then we’re “rested” from the Challenge until we return: no hard feelings.

But this is why we’re on the Challenge. Because we want a better life, right? It’s not easy. But it’s down to us to put the foundations of our future success in place, and continue to shore up our defences. We can do it. We’re doing it. Let’s keep doing it. Take a look at my earlier post today, a few up from this one. Let’s not write a "post" (n.b. It's fictitious, but illustrative) like that this month.

RESTED from the Challenge: Kadis1, Mikey Nash, LaurainSky, Loafin, Moorey, Sidney – we wish you well. Get back in touch and I’ll reinstate you to the challenge, if that’s what you’d like to do!

STATS FOR NERDS: We have 2 GURUs, 4 ELDERs, 5 STRIVERs and 7 NEWBIEs on the Challenge – 19 in total. In addition, 6 members have been ‘rested’ from the Challenge.

(P.S. Usual caveat, because I know some readers (not our members!) are still concerned with this point – you won’t be a real GURU or ELDER – it’s a literary device!!!)

ROLLCALL OF HONOUR

Raj and Antics; step forward, and take a bow. You are now STRIVERS. You mean this, and have our fullest respect. You are in growing STRIVER company, good company, and great to have you with us. You’ve shown genuine intent, day be day, let’s build on it. Congratulations!

GURUs

Phil72593 days – Day to day, doing great, Phil. But it must’ve been a bit lonely being the only Guru on the challenge, right? Well, you’re flying solo no longer because…

Changemylife331 days - … is joining you! A fellow stalwart on the Gamcare diaries, I’m sure you agree you’re in great company, Phil. Welcome once again Changemylife!

ELDERs

Degenerate – 180 days – A top three-darter from Degen, racking up those days one valuable day at a time J

Abstainer –  136 days – Grinding out those days, one at a time, Abstainer’s dairy is my favourite and well worth a visit.

ItMatters – 114 days – You have it exactly right, we are never “cured” of this. We manage it, keep it in abeyance, forever – one day at a time.

Sars27 114 days -  Fresh back from your travels, reaping what you’re sowing, which is an infinitely better life for you and your loved ones. Loving life, and that is what it’s all about!

STRIVERs

RubyBaby –  58 days – Cruising in the middle/fast lane in life, that’s the way to be RubyBaby. The signpost shows “Elder – 42 miles” and I know you’ve got it in you, day by day!

Mixer 44 days -  that’s me, chugging away, with solid blocks, utter determination and, like the rest of us, no complacency whatsoever.

Amt722 – 38 – Haven’t heard from you for a week, Amt722, so tiny alarm bells are ringing in my head. I’m sure you’re still laser-focused, do let us know how you’re getting on…

Raj – 36 – In the STRIVER ranks, and settling in nicely. Nice one, Raj. This is the place to be.

Antics – 35 – – And likewise Antics. Having just started your full-time grad course, you are giving yourself every chance, on so many levels, the very best chance of success. We’re all with you.

NEWBIES

Adam80816 days – Last week you were on 22 days, this week 16. Not sure what your total is, but if it’s 16, you’re half-way to striver. So keep going. Remember, there’s no hiding place on this Challenge – I check J

Chartom3 – 28 – Being gambling free isn’t easy. Is there such a thing as ‘gambler’s cold turkey’. I would say so, I don’t find it easy. But strength in numbers – we’re all going through this, on the Challenge, together. Can we do it, day by day? Yes we clucking well can!

4D18 – A solid score chalked up, 4D; let’s see you, day by day, get you to Striver in the next couple of weeks. Can you successfully navigate pay day? Silly question. You WILL.

Athena1991 – 17 days – The rewards of not gambling are so plentiful we cannot begin to imagine. Dreams can come too – so long as every morning, you remind yourself not to place a bet, and stick to it. Happiness will follow.

Xenedra – 12 days – This month, Xenedra, your target is to make sure payday comes and goes without a gamble. When gambling-free, payday is just another day. Let’s see you get past this month, and get to STRIVER. You’ve had a couple of false starts, and you’ve been commendable honest about it. But it’s stepping up time. Ready for it? We so want you to succeed.

Next Step7 days – A newbie joining the NEWBIES on this Challenge, and an opportunity to show us what you’re made of. You’ve put some blockers in; the question you need to ask is: is it enough? Could you still gamble if you wanted to? Remember, gamblers are cunning, crafty … keep Challenging. Day by day, let’s get you up to STRIVER.

Mark SNB 3 days – Welcome Mark, and we’re here to help support your journey. Let’s see what you’re made of!

Youtube video of the week: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7AN3VLLlkdI

Let’s keep strong; keep sharing and keep strong!

Mixer and Athena, your hosts for this challenge

Posted on:
Sun, 24/09/2017 - 20:47

changemylife

Joined:
2016-11-02

Great job Mixer. You know that we all appreciate your help and support.

Re: The above post- don't write a post like this next month. I know that it's annoying reading posts like this, but personally I don't buy it!

I think it's either a bogus post or sum numpty. Sorry, but nobody says it's all the gambling operators fault, and don't worry I've got the sympathy from gamcare every month!

Posted on:
Sun, 24/09/2017 - 21:02

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

Hi changemylife,

It was an entirety made-up post, written by me. It could have been written by me, though, in the past. I'll go back and make the situation clear. Thank you for your comments; and I'm sorry that you thought I might have copied it from somewhere. I would never do that, or make a judgement of a fellow poster's words in this way, 

All the best

Mixer

 

Posted on:
Sun, 24/09/2017 - 23:57

antics

Joined:
2017-07-30

Thanks again Mixer for the weekly roll call; I look forward to sundays and seeing how everyone in the crew is doing in your condensed but thoughtful posts. 

Posted on:
Mon, 25/09/2017 - 12:34

amt722

Joined:
2013-11-10

Sorry, missed the roll call, checking in, all good still gamble free. Difficult time with business finances but staying strong.

Great job as always Mixer with roll call and keeping this challenge going.  

Cheers 

 

Posted on:
Mon, 25/09/2017 - 21:45

changemylife

Joined:
2016-11-02

Thanks for the clarification Mixer. I get it now - the sort of stuff going on inside a gamblers head. Lame excuses, nievity and justification. But yes, let's hope that none of us follow this path.

Posted on:
Tue, 26/09/2017 - 07:56

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

No problem, changemylife - and you've got it in one :)

Amt, well done for hitting a solid 40 days today. I'm on a similar trajectory on 46 days. Whilst businesses finances will be tight for now, they will get better as you are now devoting your time and energies more profitably and thus guaranteeing yourself a much better result than otherwise.

Posted on:
Wed, 27/09/2017 - 20:51

adam808

Joined:
2017-08-27

Hi Mixer - yes the confusion with the dates, I had realised my dates didn't match up as I gambled after I initally signed up to this forum, I wanted to be honest so I fixed it.

However, as I've wrote in my diary, I placed a £10 bet two days ago and I am treating it as a relapse, so back to sqaure one. I am happy to a certain degree as it's identified certain holes in my recovery plan which I am fixing this week. Despite this... I am immensly proud I stopped at £10 - as a typical binge can be £200-£500... so I feel there has been some sort of shift in my mind. However a bet is a bet no matter how small... and I have to be honest with myself so I am starting again from scratch as I want this forum to be an honest space. Onwards and upwards. 

Day 1
 

 

Posted on:
Wed, 27/09/2017 - 22:07

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

Hi Adam,

Thank you for your update, and your honesty - which is always respected. 

You're right - back to Day 1 (or Day 2 now) you must go, because of your relapse. Ok, it was "just" a tenner but it's like the snowball rolling off the top of a mountain - it could have triggered an avalanche.

This time, I just know you're going to double down on your efforts not to gamble. You need to put some blocks in place too. No more relapses - you don't have to do this, because it will only bring you misery. Life's too short - my goodness, the people I know who are not in the best of health at the moment. Let's celebrate what we have, Adam, and not waste our time and money gambling it all away :)

Let's see you rack those days up again - and those days count more once a payday has passed :)

 

Posted on:
Thu, 28/09/2017 - 07:35

amt722

Joined:
2013-11-10

 

I'm on 42 days and having the first  sign of urges entering my head. I have fought back and will remain strong. I lost so much in my last binge that thoughts of having another go 'you can't lose' this time have emerged. I now appreciate that my fight against this addiction is going to take one all mighty effort and I must remain in the right frame of mind and not get complacent. Need to have patience, a quick fix of winning the funds back is not a consideration anymore. 

If I had not joined this challenge and had the weekly roll call maybe the 42 days would be back to 0. I enjoy a challenge and am a stubborn sod!

Thanks Mixer for your continued support to all on this challenge. 

 

 

 

Posted on:
Thu, 28/09/2017 - 13:22

Mixer

Joined:
2016-12-03

Hi amy722- Absolutely delighted to read you're a stubborn sod. That's great to hear. I'm the same, so let's both smash through the 50 GF day barrier, right? With me..? Thought so!

Posted on:
Thu, 28/09/2017 - 19:15

adam808

Joined:
2017-08-27

Mixer wrote:

Hi Adam,

Thank you for your update, and your honesty - which is always respected. 

You're right - back to Day 1 (or Day 2 now) you must go, because of your relapse. Ok, it was "just" a tenner but it's like the snowball rolling off the top of a mountain - it could have triggered an avalanche.

This time, I just know you're going to double down on your efforts not to gamble. You need to put some blocks in place too. No more relapses - you don't have to do this, because it will only bring you misery. Life's too short - my goodness, the people I know who are not in the best of health at the moment. Let's celebrate what we have, Adam, and not waste our time and money gambling it all away :)

Let's see you rack those days up again - and those days count more once a payday has passed :)

 

Thanks Mixer man - silly mistake really, but got to be honest, and got to learn. 

New checks are now in place. The remaining "spending money" has now all been withdrawn as cash, and I've ensured that next payday all future bills are going to be paid manually on the day, so I have full control over funds. This means I can basically pay all my bills, order a few things online and withdraw everything as cash to have my bank back to zero within 3 hours of being paid. In addition, I have removed Safari from my phone - and await the release of the GamBan iPhone version.

I'm annoyed, but proud I didn't gamble away the £200 odd that I had set aside to spend on myself this month. Next month I am going to make sure I don't spend a PENNY on gambling. Now the checks are in place, I can focus on recovery and start to pick apart my urges and reasons for doing this. 

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