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Posted on:
Tue, 08/08/2017 - 17:26

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

Thanks jarradnz. I hope you are doing well.
One week on now.. no urges no temptation what so ever. I am done with this evil behaviour.
Gambling should be illegal and i really praise the countries who donot allow it.
Now, i started a second evening job which only lasted for 2 days and i quit after an arguement with the manager. I was hoping this evening job will help me pay off some of my debt but it didnot work.
I have learnt the lesson the hardway and I will never gamble again in my life...

Posted on:
Sun, 13/08/2017 - 09:38

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

Gambling =
A lair
Dristracted person
Illness
Broke
Debt
Nothing good comes out of gambling.
Tomorrow will be 2 weeks GF

Posted on:
Sun, 20/08/2017 - 07:45

Abstainer

Joined:
2017-05-10

Hi Adam . Many thanks for your kind words of encouragement on my diary .

Congratulations on your 20 Days without gambling . We all know how difficult it is breaking free from this terrible compulsion to gamble . The addiction is very manipulative , it knows our weak spots and tries to destroy us .

Take care my friend . Let the past go , it's over ......stephen 

 

Posted on:
Wed, 30/08/2017 - 18:15

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

30 days of pain and sorrow, 30 days guilt and regret, 30 days of reflection, I learnt that i was greedy and i wanted more money, quick and easy money. Now i wish i have what i had 3.5 years ago before i started gambling. 

I am human, i made a mistake i fell into the trap of gambling. I will never forgive myself untill i spend the same amount i lost on my family/charity. i cry every time i see an advert of a needy person and i remember my stupid behavior.

Now i am moving forward. debt is now 17750 rather than 18250. looking forward for next month payment to see how much debt i can pay off. This will be a long road and a long challange but i choose this over gambling.

Posted on:
Thu, 31/08/2017 - 18:07

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

31 days GF. I am on holiday next week i hope will further help help my recovery.

Goodluck everyone.

Posted on:
Sat, 09/09/2017 - 09:39

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

40 days GF. I am on holiday . I fell ill on the 2nd day but i am enjoying the stress free life.

Posted on:
Tue, 19/09/2017 - 09:03

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

50 days gambling free. This is the longest time since i started gambling 3.5 years ago.

Last night i had a dream of me gambling. I freaked out, it was like a nightmare. I was so happy when i woke up to find out it was just a dream.

Goodluck to everyone in recovery.

Posted on:
Tue, 19/09/2017 - 15:14

Smashed

Joined:
2017-08-13

50 days is excellent. I think you constantly have to be on your guard. I must of asked myself a thousand times what the hell was you doing since I stopped, angry that I let it get to the amouns it did. That there is no spare money because of my stupid actions. It's good to read positive stories of folks walking away from Gambling for good, I hope I can be here in 5 years time saying I have not gambled since the 13th of August 2017.

Posted on:
Tue, 19/09/2017 - 20:53

Brad12345678910

Joined:
2017-09-19

How to you guys go days without gamballing I can't seem to do it I don't know what to do with myself anymore 

Posted on:
Tue, 19/09/2017 - 23:01

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

Hi smashed,
I slipped few times before. I was in it for the money for the winning but i realised, accepted and believe that this is all fake and i will never make any money out of gambling and i got my self into a lot of debt.
From now on i have to be on my gaurd.
Goodluck and keep on going.

Posted on:
Tue, 19/09/2017 - 23:07

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

Hi brad,
Its hard but it can be done. You just have to see and keep on remmebering all the bad things which comes with gambling.
Think of what you could do with the money spent on gambling: new car, holiday , spend money on your self and on your family.
That should be the way foward. Goodluck

Posted on:
Fri, 29/09/2017 - 08:42

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

60 days GF. I am feeling down. I guess feeling the bad results of gambling is not easy eventhough i am trying move on and look forward...

Posted on:
Sat, 14/10/2017 - 11:25

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

75 days GF. This is going to be along long road...
The more things settle down. The clearer the picture is. I can see how bads things have been and the size of the damage i have caused.

Posted on:
Sat, 21/10/2017 - 01:14

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

82 days GF. Budget abit tight. 1 week for payday.
Goodluck everyone and keep strong

Posted on:
Sun, 29/10/2017 - 11:26

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

90 Days Gambling Free.
3 months ago I had my biggest lost of of £3250 in less 24 hours. That was crazy but that was my biggest wake up call.
As a result of my losses I maxed out 1 overdraft and 2 credit cards.
I had my bills paid for par my council tax ( i had to borrow money from a friend to pay this bill) I freaked out I though this is me done. I couldnot work out how much my monthly minimum payments would be. Overtime at work was drying out, I was terrified.
Now 3 months on....
My debt is down from 18.5k to 16.5k. I have no savings for emergency but this is my next step. I will also try and gather all the debt on one credit card through balance transfers.
Everything is better now, I am not yet out of the danger zone but i am on the right track.
I will be lying to say if gambling thoughts havenot come to my head especially when bills amd payments are due. Budget is very tight at the moment but i am still in the early stage.
Goodluck everyone, hopefully one day gambling will be illegal and no one has to go this painfull and hurtfull experience.

Posted on:
Sun, 29/10/2017 - 17:28

Sharon41

Joined:
2017-03-16

90 days is quote something and to clear that amount too. Sometimes I feel I will never be debt free but like yourself slowly my mountain is being chipped away at. Hope you'very had a good weekend and here's to your next 90 days and beyond S:) 

Posted on:
Sun, 29/10/2017 - 19:17

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

Thanks sharon.
I think I paid a fair bit of debt in the heat of the momen if you know what i mean.
I think my debt repayment plan will slow down abit cuz i have been tough on myself for the last 3 months.
As long as I donot gamble eveything will be okay. Even if i need anything i can turn to family and friend for help but for an honest and true reasons.
Goodluck in your recovery. Looking forward what the next 90 days will bring.

Posted on:
Sun, 29/10/2017 - 20:25

sjwsjw

Joined:
2017-10-27

Awesome mate, you didn't let your slip up stop you and look at you go now. Great job paying that debt down you should be proud of what you have already done. Think where you can be in a years time. Yes that seems a long way off but just keep doing what you're doing and it will come.

Posted on:
Sun, 29/10/2017 - 21:34

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

Thanks sjwsjw for your encouragement.
How are you getting on...?

Posted on:
Sun, 29/10/2017 - 21:56

sjwsjw

Joined:
2017-10-27

Im 33 days GF. This is my first REAL effort to stop this madness. I've finally accepted i cannot do this alone. Close family now know everything, they have my cards and give me an allowance, unsual blocks in place to stop me online too and im having phone counselling, second phone call will be tomorrow night. Im 29 and have a 10k debt from sports betting.

Have already had tough days and have had to face up to some areas of myself im not happy with and need to work on but im feeling better for the honesty i have final shown and feel more free of the guilt that has crippled me for years from hiding this and letting it continue.

Lets finish this year strong and make 2018 a gamble free one!
 

Posted on:
Sun, 05/11/2017 - 11:40

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

Last night I had a bad dream. I dreamt of a relapse. I lost £ 3190 in the dream.

Oh my god, I was so happy and relieved to wake up and realise it was just a bad dream.

97 days GF free :)

Posted on:
Mon, 06/11/2017 - 22:19

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

2 days to go for 100 days GF.
Nice, my true me is on the way back the 3& half years gambling spell wasnot a person like me. A really bad spell in my life..lesson learnt....

Posted on:
Wed, 08/11/2017 - 11:16

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

100 days GF.
A parking fine has ruined my celebration today.
I am trying to save the pound and guess what i get a £65 ticket. Well annoyed with my self.

Posted on:
Wed, 08/11/2017 - 21:13

Abstainer

Joined:
2017-05-10

Congratulations Adam on 100 Days GF.

Sorry about your parking ticket, I have had a few in the past and it is really annoying. 

Posted on:
Wed, 08/11/2017 - 21:15

degenerate

Joined:
2013-05-10

Awesome Adam. Very well done.

Posted on:
Wed, 08/11/2017 - 21:18

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

Thanks abstainer
Thanks degenerate

Posted on:
Wed, 08/11/2017 - 21:20

sjwsjw

Joined:
2017-10-27

Well done Adam! Big milestone regardless of that stupid ticket -_- On to the next 100

Posted on:
Wed, 08/11/2017 - 21:55

Moorey631986

Joined:
2016-09-08

Well done Adam! :)

Superb achievement to reach 3 figures!  

That parking ticket fine will feel like a drop in the ocean compared to the thousands that you’ve saved from not gambling. 

Don’t let it spoil your celebrations.

Posted on:
Wed, 08/11/2017 - 22:29

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

Thanks sjwsjw
Thanks Moorey.
Count for the next 100 starts tomorrow. This site has been a great help :)

Posted on:
Tue, 14/11/2017 - 21:42

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

The worest thing about gambling is when you see, hear and feel how people around you are moving on with life, planning holidays, buying new cars etc..
I was like that I want to be like that again...

Posted on:
Thu, 16/11/2017 - 19:16

adam808

Joined:
2017-08-27

Bit of a late congratulations here for your huge milestone last week! 

I can relate to how you feel about people moving on with your life, but I try to tell myself that I'm rebuilding my life again with better foundations. And yes, it's gonna take me a bit longer to catch up, but when I do, my life will be so much more secure and I'll enjoy everything in general so much more with that safety net.

Posted on:
Sat, 18/11/2017 - 09:09

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

Thanks Adam. I agree, I just have to be more patient..
110 GF.
Have a GF weekend everyone.

Posted on:
Wed, 22/11/2017 - 20:44

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

Feeling low today. Lastnight I did something weird I played free roulette its just a game downloaded of playstore and I also watched rocka fellla on youtube, watch him win/lose fortunes.
Today I had a really bad day, things are not going myway. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day. 114 GF soon will be 4 months.

Posted on:
Thu, 23/11/2017 - 08:51

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

I donot know what's wrong gambling thoughs are back on my mind..
Urges are all time high since i stopped 4 months ago.
I really worried...

Posted on:
Thu, 23/11/2017 - 09:04

Muststop123

Joined:
2017-10-03

Hi Adam

Hang in there and keep strong. Use whatever blocks you have in place and try and remember how low gambling took you - do you want to go there again?

What are those urges really? They are just a thought inside your head  - don't blow them up to be something big and powerful that has control of you. You are the one in control of them.

You can do this.

Posted on:
Thu, 23/11/2017 - 09:44

Horall

Joined:
2017-09-23

Just read your diary Adam, well done to you. I am only on day 3, and so much of what you said sounds familiar. I hate having to worry every time I'm due to go out with friends, or need to go shopping, as I know my finances are so stretched ... I feel so ashamed of myself at times. 100 days GF seems amazing to me, but your diary has certainly spurred me on 

Posted on:
Thu, 23/11/2017 - 16:06

Wilsy

Joined:
2012-02-22

Hi Adam, I read your first post and you also sound like me, I thought I could win 50-100 a day and I'm not 11-12k in debt. Together we can all beat this, one day at a time

Wilsy

Posted on:
Fri, 24/11/2017 - 16:53

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

Thanks must stop and horall. I am feeling more positive today. This emotional rollercoaster aint great.
I guess it's part of the recovery process.

Posted on:
Wed, 29/11/2017 - 11:05

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

121 GF
Close relative has passed away couple of days ago so i am in a really sad mood.
This year has been the toughest year in my life. Soon this year will be in the past just like my gambling.

Posted on:
Thu, 07/12/2017 - 14:13

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

129 days GF... life's back to normal. I just need to sort out my debt.

Posted on:
Thu, 07/12/2017 - 16:48

sjwsjw

Joined:
2017-10-27

Good to hear from you Adam, you doing great.

Posted on:
Thu, 07/12/2017 - 19:45

Adamjamal2014-2017

Joined:
2017-06-11

Thank sjwsjw. How u getting on ?

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