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#1 Posted on:
Mon, 06/10/2014 - 20:12

Balfour

Joined:
2013-02-25

I cannot stop gambling on the fobts. I am a hopeless compulsive gambler. Just walked into the bookies was 600 up in 10 minutes but still managed to lose a grand!!! This is my 4th diary and currently in a terrible place with gambling. Soon as I get money I get shaky and can't wait to feed my habit. Gambling is my drug, I'm like a ****** that needs a fix. I'm so lonely and lost at the moment. Tomorrow is day 1 I have to stop this, it can't go on.

Posted on:
Tue, 07/10/2014 - 22:22

Balfour

Joined:
2013-02-25

Day 1 complete

Posted on:
Tue, 07/10/2014 - 23:03

winger

Joined:
2010-07-28

Hi Balfour, i have the same problem I was always back and forth on them. Up one minute then thinking about going back and winning then down and chasing. My head was all over the place from them.
Just take it one day at a time, the urges do get less and less. Keep it up

Posted on:
Wed, 08/10/2014 - 21:14

Balfour

Joined:
2013-02-25

Day 2 complete. Urge was strong but resisted

Posted on:
Thu, 14/01/2016 - 21:28

Balfour

Joined:
2013-02-25

Nearly 3 years since I first joined here and STILL completely hooked. Just completed my first day gamble free, took the humiliating but liberating step of banning myself from ALL local bookies. Never wanted anything more than to stop gambling but I just can't seem to. The voices on my shoulder telling me to gamble!! Even thou I know I can't win cause no matter how much I win it will NEVER be enough!! The roulette machines are my biggest downfall, as a problem gambler and addict to these machines it's easy for me to say they should be banned but they really should. Dangerous machines designed to suck mugs like me into losing thousands of pounds. Government don't care dlas long as there getting the tax there happy. I'm so ashamed and embarrassed my by behaviour that I find it near impossible to tell anyone how addicted I am, but I've told 2 people I'm banned from the bookies today and it felt good to tell someone that I have a problem. Currently around 10 grand in debt but if I stay gamble free should be able to clear this in around 5 months. That's a long way ahead just need to go 1 day at a time so il try my hardest tomorrow. 

Posted on:
Thu, 14/01/2016 - 21:47

Oldhamktf

Joined:
2015-09-26

Well done for coming back and starting to make steps excluding from the bookies a great start. Get the triangle in place I don't carry any money apart form the odd couple of pound. Call fanfare they will give you advise maybe look at counselling or Ga. and keep posting in your diary and read others learn from them take what works for you. 

KTF 

Posted on:
Fri, 15/01/2016 - 21:19

Balfour

Joined:
2013-02-25

Day 2 complete no gambling. Talked about the perils of gambling today to friends, felt good to let some frustration and anger out. 

Posted on:
Fri, 15/01/2016 - 21:45

Oldhamktf

Joined:
2015-09-26

Well done on day 2 and telling others I've told lots of people another block for me not had one bad reaction. 

Saturday tomorrow a tricky day get a plan and keep yourself busy

Posted on:
Sun, 17/01/2016 - 08:56

Balfour

Joined:
2013-02-25

Day 3 with no roulette completed, £500 to find now as van broke. Should have this money to hand but been far to stupid and put it in a machine. Making me realise thou it's time to grow up. 

Posted on:
Sun, 17/01/2016 - 09:05

I wished

Joined:
2014-04-25

Well done on day 3 B

Keep strong 

Suzanne xx

Posted on:
Mon, 18/01/2016 - 20:10

Balfour

Joined:
2013-02-25

Day 5 of no roulette complete. The thought to spin did enter my mind today but obviously being barred from the bookies helped hugely, thoughts soon disapeared. 

Posted on:
Mon, 18/01/2016 - 22:59

gambler.toad

Joined:
2015-09-21

Hello Balfour,

Well done on coming back. After 3 years you are still fighting this addiction. You deserve credit for that.

I'm still battling addiction. I can barely make a week these days. Stay strong and keep posting.

I wish you all the very best in your recovery.

Toad.

Posted on:
Wed, 20/01/2016 - 19:23

Balfour

Joined:
2013-02-25

A week of no roulette complete. Paying off a few debts need to keep on paying them and be strong. I will beat this!!

Posted on:
Sun, 24/01/2016 - 19:01

Balfour

Joined:
2013-02-25

11days of no roulette completed. Feeling good about the future for a change

Posted on:
Thu, 28/01/2016 - 19:22

Balfour

Joined:
2013-02-25

15 days done, sitting here thinking I'm 38 and gambled everything I've earnt and I'm debt. Makes me feel sad/depressed/stupid/ashamed. Can only change my future and not the past, I MUST do this!!! 

Posted on:
Wed, 03/02/2016 - 21:01

Balfour

Joined:
2013-02-25

3 weeks in and I've struggled the last couple of days, guess that's just withdrawal symptons. Pretty bad to be honest but not gambled. Just feel so lonely

Posted on:
Wed, 03/02/2016 - 21:08

Loxxie

Joined:
2016-01-15

Hey. ...be proud....one day at a time...your beating me I'm only 21days.....good luck x

Posted on:
Fri, 23/06/2017 - 16:38

Balfour

Joined:
2013-02-25

Right currently sitting in my bedroom feeling sorry for myself after losing £4500 in the last week to roulette machines in the bookies. I realy want to tell a friend about my serious addiction but just can't bring myself to do it even thou I know a huge weight will be lifted off my shoulders. This makes me feel even more pathetic, a vicious vicious circle. Il be 40 in October and I seriously need to sort myself out or I can see myself killing myself one day due to gambling. I have to drag my sorry **** to ga on Thursday for the much needed help I need. I hope someone reads this and replys as I could really do with some encouragement as I'm the only person in my life who truly knows how bad my addiction is

Posted on:
Fri, 23/06/2017 - 17:01

g-doggy

Joined:
2010-01-25

Hi, I am in no position to give advice having lost, won, lost, won and lost lost in the last few weeks. Its got me in £700 debt. Yesterday was the final straw and I lost £490 in the bookies in 20 minutes on the slots! So what I have done today is exclude from all my local bookies, I cannot go online either. Today I still have that horrible feeling of losing the money, that will soon go and guess what, I cannot go in the bookies for 12 months, I take yesterday as a positive of sorts as it could have been a lot worse and I am now excluded. I would recomend it. The money has now gone, forget it, what you need to do is make sure you dont do it again by getting blocks in place. I am desperate to go in and try to win m oney back, look how I ended up yesterday, that went well! Good luck and get excluding, its easy to do.

Posted on:
Fri, 23/06/2017 - 18:23

Balfour

Joined:
2013-02-25

Hi, thanks for the advice but I've already excluded but found my way back in but I'm gonna have to re exclude I have no choice

Posted on:
Fri, 23/06/2017 - 18:47

triangle

Joined:
2014-03-14

Balfour wrote:

Right currently sitting in my bedroom feeling sorry for myself after losing £4500 in the last week to roulette machines in the bookies. I realy want to tell a friend about my serious addiction but just can't bring myself to do it even thou I know a huge weight will be lifted off my shoulders. This makes me feel even more pathetic, a vicious vicious circle. Il be 40 in October and I seriously need to sort myself out or I can see myself killing myself one day due to gambling. I have to drag my sorry **** to ga on Thursday for the much needed help I need. I hope someone reads this and replys as I could really do with some encouragement as I'm the only person in my life who truly knows how bad my addiction is

I can tell you there is hope, but it depends on how bad your illness is and what measures you are willing to put into place.  Good to know you are planning on going to GA but don't forget about counselling and support from those around you. 

 

Posted on:
Fri, 23/06/2017 - 23:26

Julie 35

Joined:
2016-11-18

HI Balfour,

I would say look at counselling and put whatever measures in place you need to matey to try and kick this habit.  There are so many great resources out there to help.  It is not easy, it really isn't but the hard work will pay off in the end.

Take care.

Julie x

Posted on:
Sat, 24/06/2017 - 19:06

Balfour

Joined:
2013-02-25

Day 1 done! Had money in my pocket but no urges to gamble, probably due to being tired from a wedding reception last night. If only every day was this easy. Oh well on to day 2

Posted on:
Sun, 25/06/2017 - 19:53

Balfour

Joined:
2013-02-25

Day 2 a success no gambling no urges. Taking one day at a time must stay out the bookies

Posted on:
Sun, 25/06/2017 - 22:39

alainepo

Joined:
2016-07-27

Hello Balfour, i say you should tell a close friend, what is the worst that could happen? By your own words you have tried many years to quit gambling without success so try something different this time around and break the secrecy, seriously what is the worst that could happen if you tell a close friend? You are not a rapist or a murderer you are just a problem gambler and a close friend will help look out for you. You said earlier that you can see yourself killing yourself one day due to gambling, do you think your friends would rather attend your funeral or find out now you are a problem gambler so they can help? Would you want to know if one of your friends was in your situation so you could help them? Of course you would. You said yourself it would lift a huge weight off your shoulders so you know it's a good thing to do. Come on Balfour try something different this time around and tell someone you have a problem, it can't hurt and it may very well change everything for you.