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Hello - My story

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#1 Posted on:
Sat, 12/08/2017 - 19:30

Philgam

Joined:
2017-08-12

Hello everyone, I'm Phil and I have a gambling addiction. This is my first time on a website like this but I'd like to share my story. 

I have been gambling for 4 years now on and off, but it's this last year that the amounts I gamble have increased dramatically. I have played a game called runescape from the age of 8, but didn't get into gambling until the age of 20/21. What I would do is buy virtual items on the game and stake them against other players (50/50 odds) but the game mechanics works on streak really, anything could happen. It started off as a bit of fun at first, but I kept chasing my losses even though deep down I know I wouldn't get it back. ( I know it sounds stupid) I don't know how much I have lost all together but it's 10s of thousands of pounds. It's only this last year that I have lost a lot. I lost £12k in 3 weeks. I have been gamble free for 2 months, but I just relapsed today and lost £1200. Everyday I just think of the amount of money I have lost and I just can't go in with my life. I know I should just think it's just money, but it's hard, I've saved hard for my money and a stupid mistake has ruined my life. It's easy to say just forget about it and move on, but it's not that easy. I feel like I won't ever be happy again until I have all my money back that I have lost. I feel like I will never get over this and nothing can fix my problem. It's in the mind. I have been taking anti-depressants for 3 years now, but only my mother knows about my gambling, nobody else. I just felt like I had to tell someone. I feel really ashamed and guilty all the time. I do have a decent paid job, but I feel like leaving it and just be at home. I can't concentrate anymore. 

Thanks for taking your time to read this

 

 

Posted on:
Sat, 12/08/2017 - 20:28

conradnose

Joined:
2017-06-21

Hello Phil,

It's great that you've told your mother but how much do you speak to her about it? What about GA meetings or 1-2-1 counselling. 

How did you feel in that 2 months? What helped you get through those 2 months gamble free?

There's plenty of support on here and look at the success stories it's proof people have come back from this addiction and made a better life for themselves.

Goodluck

Conradnose

check out my blog www.conradnose.com

Posted on:
Sat, 12/08/2017 - 22:17

Merry go round

Joined:
2017-06-08

Hi Phil the money is gone. It sounds like you need to deal with your depression, not wanting to work and stay in is a very common symptom. Talk to your gp maybe change your dose, get some counselling. Gamcare offer free counselling too so ring helpline. My husband the same, gp very understanding. Good luck, do get help.

Posted on:
Sat, 12/08/2017 - 22:48

Compulsive Gambler

Joined:
Before 2009

make that £1,200 lost today the best money you've ever spent - let it be the last money you ever gamble with

That money is not coming back and even IF you did get some or all of it back it would be very temporary and then it would be gone again, probably with more on top

reach out and get the help 

Posted on:
Mon, 14/08/2017 - 17:38

Forum admin

Joined:
2010-11-01

Hi Philgam,

Welcome to the forum, and thanks for sharing your story with us. Much as you haven’t mentioned your gambling problem to anyone apart from your mum, you managed to share it with us, and that was brave!

By sharing your problem, it somehow lessens the impact that the gambling problem is having on you. It’s also only by opening up that professionals and significant others would be able to support you.

There’s a lot of support that we can offer you in terms of your gambling problem; various strategies you can apply to enable you control and eventually stop, and we can even refer you to 12 sessions of free counselling if you think that would help you to overcome your gambling problem. There are other charitable organisations that we can refer you to if we feel you’d benefit from their services too.

You’ve managed to take the important step to lead you to your recovery – a step in the right direction.

It would be helpful if we can know a bit more of your gambling history, so we can advise you on options available to you in regards to your recovery.

I’ll advise that you make an appointment and see your GP about the way you’re feeling; it sounds like you’re feeling depressed, and it’s the doctor who would be able to support you in this respect.

I also suggest that you contact our free phone Helpline on: 0808 8020 133, and speak to one of our advisers for more help and support.

You can contact us anytime between 8am and midnight, everyday.

Help is here at Gamcare. And there’s no need for you to suffer in isolation or secrecy.

I wish you well in your effort to overcome your gambling problem, and please keep posting!

Regards,

Beatrice