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Posted on:
Tue, 31/01/2017 - 17:48

Oldhamktf

Joined:
2015-09-26

Just for today I will try to live through this day only and not tackle my whole life problems at once. 

Posted on:
Wed, 01/02/2017 - 11:12

freda

Joined:
2009-06-24

Here, here. Just for today.

Darling S x x Why did you gamble? or drink? Think on your own phrase: it deteriorated when I got rid of my comfort blankets. How on earth can gambling yourself into distress and debt be a COMFORT BLANKET??!! Well, it distracted you from this pain, didn't it? Escapism. We become addicted to anything that lets us forget our pain, our problems, our inner demons. What sweet relief it is to become so absorbed in something else that all the other stuff goes away for a while. I believe for you, as long as you remember this context, being in more pain is progress. You are feeling. When we have run away from our feelings for many years this is very intense. We have a backlog in our "in" tray. In fact, it overflows. It always catches up with us, though. We can't run forever. Better to face a few years of bottled emotions now, than 20 years of them in the future.

Sometimes you gotta get worse before you get better. This is why some people initially get worse in therapy. There is nowhere to run in that therapists room. All our feelings come up to the surface and it stings like hell. Then it peaks and starts to go down.

I know you have the strength and bravery to face everything inside of you. It's OK to be scared and want to run away again, it's OK if we temporarily lose our bottle and actually run away again, as long as we come back to it.

You got this, S. As long as you take it one day at a time. I believe in you

F x

Posted on:
Wed, 01/02/2017 - 21:36

Forum admin

Joined:
2010-11-01

Hi S,

it sounds like things are quite challenging for you at the moment. Just wanted to say, the Helpline and Netline is there for you, so when you need to talk, please feel free to call us.

All the best,

Eva

Forum Admin

Posted on:
Thu, 02/02/2017 - 19:22

LifeBegins

Joined:
2013-03-28

Hey there Lovely. Thanks for dropping by. I've been thinking about you, but I didn't really know what to say. Things sound really tough for you right now. I agree with all that Freda had to say. I don't think it's suprising that you're experiencing lots of difficult feelings at the moment. The meetings seem to be bringing to the fore a lot of old emotions and memories. Your post on tuesday spoke of that. And you're dealing with it without resorting to your addictions. That's a hard thing to do and it's why you're feeling so raw and overwhelmed at times. But it's so important to do that. To feel it all. That's not easy and it's uncomforatble, and upsetting and makes you want to run or get angry or lash out (to others and yourself). But it's part of the healing. As ever, I worry that you're doing this alone. I know you have the meetings and lots of very good support, but still I pray for the day that you'll bite the bullet and accept professional help. You raised the counselling? Psychiatrist? question. You know my thoughts ;) but I think I'm starting to understand yours too and I have to accept that you won't/can't go until you're absolutely ready. Who knows when that will be?

I watched the In Therapy with Callum Best and the therapist Mandi Saligari programme today. It's on channel 5 (you can download it). And as I watched it there were things she said, that made me think of you. You're nothing like him and your experiences are very different, and yet there was some fundamental things in there that resonated with me and I felt would resonate with you too. If you feel minded to, why not watch it? See if you get a feel of what she's saying. I'd be interested if you can connect with some of the things she said.

Listen S, I have no great words of wisdom for you. I wish I could take away your pain, but I can't. It's in your hands. For what it's worth I think you're doing what's needed.

((((S)))) 

Posted on:
Sun, 05/02/2017 - 09:46

Cynical wife

Joined:
2015-06-23

Hi, Sandra,

Nothing useful to say, just a flyby to wish you well.

KOKO,

CW

Posted on:
Mon, 13/02/2017 - 20:25

volcano

Joined:
2010-07-05

Nice post there Sandra.

Posted on:
Tue, 14/02/2017 - 23:14

freda

Joined:
2009-06-24

Acceptance. What a lovely place to be :-) Can feel that coming off the page.

Yes, we are where we are. I don't know if this will mean anything to you but I know you share a feeling of "I shouldn't be feeling this way" a lot. That yes, I know I have emotional scars but I don't always know why I am so low on some days. Some days there is no clear emotional trigger.

It's just a small observation but in it I think there is a lot of profound truth. When I lived with my father, I would cry a lot. He would try and "control" it. Asking "why are you crying?" Often, I would have no idea. This focus on why did not feel good. It made me feel more confused and more 'unwell'. Fast-forward to living with my (now ex) husband. He accepted that I am a very emotional person, often I don't know why I am crying, or low, or anxious. Of course I look for common triggers - because understanding these is a huge advantage - but if there is no obvious reason, it's OK. It always passes, it's just the way you are, he would remind me.  I know you're going to be OK, the important thing for you is to not bottle it up. Well, in this household, guess what? I am much happier, at peace, supported and well.

Because I am accepted. Fully accepted. For who I am and how I feel. I don't have to have a reason. I think this is just so key. I know sometimes you scare yourself at these strong storms that come. What if that's just who you are, right now? Maybe someday you won't have these episodes of intense emotion, maybe you will have them for the rest of your life. Either way, much easier to accept yourself. Some things we are not supposed to be able to control - our emotions are one of those things. We don't choose them, they just are

Hope this makes some sense.

F x

Posted on:
Fri, 17/02/2017 - 18:29

volcano

Joined:
2010-07-05

Hello Lithuania Robin Hood, now your in the safety of sherwood forest you can picture the gambling/ drink as the big bad sheriff and give him a good kicking!

Good on you Sandra, you've come a long way! Be proud as you head in the right direction.

Winners pick winners and as I've said before it's no coincidence that you've pall-ied up ( made up word ) with some top people on this forum.

You'll no doubt bump into little John soon, no need to fall in the trent as he's also a good un

Posted on:
Sat, 18/02/2017 - 16:01

judy

Joined:
2012-07-23

Hi Sis,

Just a flyer. And your comment to your diary raised a smile on this old mug. Yes, me, myself and I and ....the rest of the globe. :-D  keep writing if it helps girl. Good bad ugly. Hell its all good! ((((((S))))))

Posted on:
Sat, 18/02/2017 - 18:31

robf

Joined:
2010-04-29

Hi Sandra

I get lonely too. I can be lonely in a room full of people, nevermind if I am actually on my own. I have been thinking alot recently on how much this loneliness has been created by me. How I have let current friendships drift off and die and how I have not made any real effort to reach out and make new friends. It can be a lonely world I create for myself and I can easily sink into self-pity about how no one likes me. I am not saying this is the case with you, just thought I would share that. 

What helped me is joining groups. I used to laugh whenever this was suggested as a way of meeting new people and friends but essentially isnt that what we do in GA/AA rooms? I also joined an amateur dramatics group and a ukulele group, both have been good for my recovery. Joining the gym/swimming pool classes sounds a great idea. Go for it. Maybe also reach out and ask a AA member to meet up for coffee/food/cinema. 

I think ultimately life is best shared and witnessed with other people but I do really feel there is time and space for solitude in life. There is a difference to being on your own and being lonely. I go to cinema and do other things on my own alot and I can enjoy them. Pick a film you really want to see, if one isnt showing then hold off and wait. Buy the large fizzy drink and popcorn and go escape into a film for two hours. I have always thought the cinema isn't that great a place for a social meet up anyway, you cant talk or shouldnt talk in a movie. Those people annoy the hell out of me :)

Posted on:
Sun, 19/02/2017 - 14:46

Lulubobs1966

Joined:
2015-07-19

Hi hs thank you for your post to me means a lot, hope ur ok. I've got some catching up to do Lulu X

Posted on:
Sun, 26/02/2017 - 09:54

boxingdayfresh

Joined:
2014-12-28

 

Hey !

Been a stranger - but back on the site today so just dropping in to say a quick hi ! I've joined the 2017 challenge today and just dropping in to your diary to say well done on 250 days ! Great achievement and best wishes on your continued journey x 

 

 

Posted on:
Tue, 28/02/2017 - 10:02

S.A

Joined:
Before 2009

Hello...

Just been reading your last 2 posts... much I could comment on. Much of it made me smile. Much of it I could relate to.

Some thoughts in no particular order.....

I chomp through my food. I eat quickly and ravenously but not noisilly. I keep my gob shut when in company... cos I know how annoying other peoples eating can be.

Forgive yourself for not going for a run, the weather was particularly rubbish yesterday. I find its not so much the cold, but the cold WITH the wind and rain. I would not have run yesterday, even if I had the time... maybe today.

I do not have a car or a mortgage or a girlfriend but I do have debts (lucky me!).... the point being that there are always people worse off than yourself.... I know know people of my age, who are bed bound through disability... its all relative. I have my health, I have my family, I have options.

They say to feel the feelings and set them free.

I believe we all spiritual beings and when we die we detach from our bodies and life continues in a different form...

Life goes on... S.A :-)

Posted on:
Tue, 28/02/2017 - 15:02

Amom

Joined:
2014-10-09

Just a fly by... quietly cheering you on on your road to recovery/self discovery.

Have a great day Sandra:)

Cathyx

Posted on:
Tue, 28/02/2017 - 21:43

boxingdayfresh

Joined:
2014-12-28

Wishing you well and hope you're feeling positive. You're doing great in fighting this addiction and are inspiration to others. Keep on fighting this and thanks for dropping by my diary x 

Posted on:
Sat, 04/03/2017 - 13:35

freda

Joined:
2009-06-24

Hi S x x

Been catching up with you since my own world went a bit nuts and busy and stressy.

I read on one of your entries that you are crying for no reason. No reason?!!! Far too harsh on yourself. You are still in a relatively new job, working recovery, have moved house, live alone and also bought house which can feel daunting and big commitment/pressure. If you cried every day for a month, I'd still say it was normal. 

You are doing amazingly. Wish you saw what I see :-) I understand about living alone and feeling a bit vulnerable, I'm in that position, too. Maybe just introduce yourself to your neighbours next time you see them. Often just being on first name terms and saying hello can do a lot for those isolated feelings. I also experienced rage a few days after moving. It's the stress coming out. Normal! Sadly I directed mine at new neighbours with an angry note. That is a real shame but I forgive myself for being imperfect and struggling with emotions.

Take care,

F x

Posted on:
Sat, 04/03/2017 - 23:28

Amom

Joined:
2014-10-09

Hi HS.

My lil one (all 6'3" of him:) ) is just coming through a relapse after being 1 year (and 2 days) gamble free. It crushes me to my core to see one of my kids in pain. I have been in Gam Anon for 3 years but you never quite get used to the feeling of utter sadness and sheer anger of dealing with this addiction. That said I am 1000% better at compartmentalizing it and continuing to live my best life.

Be good to yourself ... alcohol/gambling is not the answer and I know you know that no matter how funny you make the story.

Love to you

Cathyx

 

Posted on:
Mon, 06/03/2017 - 16:02

gav123

Joined:
Before 2009

Hi Sandra, Im back again after lengthy  absence been doing a bit more researching into the bottle! Amazing im over 270 days gamble free, cant seem to string 5 days together without taking a sup of vodka, my latest alcoholic friend. Sound s like were both going thru a tough spell im sorry to hear, im really pretty sick mentally and physically right now but want / need to get better. Thanks for checking up on me, i really do appreciate it, i've had my head stuck in the sand for far too long now, I need to face reality

We addicts are of a sensitive sort , if 99 people told us we were doing really well and 1 told us we are were doing **** we'd just obssess about that 1 person! I take a good game but i've got to act. I really hope things will pick up for both of us, just for today , a day at a time.

Take Care

Gav,

Posted on:
Fri, 10/03/2017 - 12:37

Markman

Joined:
2011-12-14

Love your open down to earth posts Sandra. Auburn is nice! So pleased you have addiction under control and good luck with the programme.

Posted on:
Fri, 17/03/2017 - 23:00

Amom

Joined:
2014-10-09

 

You are doing great inspite of what "addiction" whispers in your ear. I am so happy you have a sponsor!

This was the topic in my Gam Anon meeting last week;

"It's easier to act your way into a new way of thinking, than to think your way into a new way of acting"

Have a great addiction free weekend Sandra

Cathyx

 

Posted on:
Sun, 19/03/2017 - 21:36

volcano

Joined:
2010-07-05

Hello ....

From someone who is quite ' ofai ' at stalling, its time to get back on the horse just like the brave Sir Robin and ride proudly through Shewood......................https://youtu.be/jYFefppqEtE

No words of wisdom from me ....., i'll just agree with Rach, you've done well of late, you put your words into actions.

Posted on:
Mon, 20/03/2017 - 15:36

judy

Joined:
2012-07-23

Hi Sis,

I must be mellowing because the "I am not a robot game" is starting to be fun. :-D. Anyway, you certainly have come a long way and I too am so grateful to have met you and others on this site. I have always maintained that keeping a diary IS sharing. One of the hardest lessons for me through this process has been to remain true to myself. We are not perfect people and we might even go a little overboard from time to time but, we put it out there. The good the bad and the ugly. Dear Diary ( and the whole world) yup. It's my gift take it or leave it. I tell you all the time and I will again. I appreciate your unconditional support girl! -joan xx

Posted on:
Mon, 20/03/2017 - 18:34

volcano

Joined:
2010-07-05

' I still want a puppy ' There cool, but in my small minded opinion ' rescue dogs are cooler..... and cleverer!! They say that dogs pick there owners not the other way round !

Off the beaten track I went.

You crossed the threshold ...... Keep at it, don't listen to the bs thoughts that ' fellowship is good but not for me, cannot get other the spiritual thing ' ! That's just old thinking..... Only my humble there .....

A question to leave you on but is the name change to ....... , similar to when Prin.ce changed his name to a symbol ?

Posted on:
Mon, 20/03/2017 - 20:20

cardhue

Joined:
2013-01-18

Hi Sandra

I just posted a post meant for my diary, on yours.

Sorry to hear about recent slip. Seems to me you are making good progress. Really hope you persevere with your recovery.

Best
Louis

 

Posted on:
Tue, 21/03/2017 - 03:57

Rainman

Joined:
2017-03-18

Hi S, thankyou very much for posting to me, its been a while and a lot of water under the bridge, its good to hear from you,.

I am in regular contact with J and she says to you , quote ,, S, i thankyou deeply for your best wishes, There is no need for any apology. i understand and the offer of a chat and a crappy coffee at mine will always be open. Take care of yourself , i wish you all the best too...

Im glad to have passed these messages between you both... take care mate, i will, and j has been looking after herself, no bother. Rainman

Posted on:
Sun, 26/03/2017 - 02:58

Amom

Joined:
2014-10-09

Have a lovely addiction free Sunday Sandra (& Bella:))

Cathyx

Posted on:
Thu, 30/03/2017 - 15:26

Rhoda

Joined:
2016-12-06

Hi S, don't think I have commented on your diary before, but talk of a 4 legged friend....well just had to. I have two dogs, youngest is 9 months. She came into season last week so couldn't have normal cuddles cos of mess. Saturday I felt so low, went out and bought Pampers, cut a hole in them for her tail, and now she is free to wander round the house again and jump on my knee....we are both so much happier. Enjoy your friend...mine lift my mood so much.

Posted on:
Thu, 30/03/2017 - 17:05

ODAAT

Joined:
2014-11-10

I'm confused...Why does having a dog mean you can't get to your normal meetings?  Are you saying you have to be with her 24/7 if you're not working?  That won't take away the guilt of leaving her to work!  I have to agree with your sponsor...Quit if you're not ready but don't put the blame elsewhere.  If I was her, I'd be pretty miffed too...She told you this was a bad idea & you have followed it up with proof that she was right.  She's only looking out for you.  I'm not your sponsor though, I'm your friend & as a friend I say, don't bite off your nose to spite your face...If you think 1 meeting a week is enough, go to it.

We can always find a reason not to work our recovery but without it, we're not the people we can be.  Time to stop running away & @ least take the bits you do need if you think you can do it your way.

Posted on:
Thu, 30/03/2017 - 19:41

volcano

Joined:
2010-07-05

...... wrote:
Well...as predicted massive row with a sponsor. The way she spoke to me is absolutely unacceptable even for po*tty mouth as me. Had to end the call saying i will get bk to her before all god swearr y Sandra showed up.

**** it. If she thinks I'm not committed enough... it's her business not mine. Yes recovery comes first..I'm not even one foot in that stuff yet so rather wait till i degrade before committing to 5 meetings a week

Peed me off tbh. Give me a bottle.. lol...& not a milk one!

I can find solution or i can find excuse. She thinks I'm making excuses...maybe i am or maybe I'm putting my family members first! When i learn to be selfish enough to put myself first may e that's then i can walk into the rooms again.

Not ready...one meeting a week is not enough...**** it..none of them will be present now...& no sponsor.

Rant over..i did my best this last final time but i rather choose life on my bloody terms.

Agreed with Odaat there ...... in 3274

And not sure I'm gonna articulate this point very well or whether it will be well received ? Which really doesn't matter as its well intended.

How do you want your sponsor to speak to you ? Is she / he is telling you things the way it is for there benefit ? Or do they get it ?

I'm asking them questions through experience. Not via a sponsor per se, but from someone who can cut through the b,s of addiction b.s. talk. Someone who I had more rows bordering on nastiness with in anyone in my life time...... And guess what ? You know the person also.

I'm not sure whether that made sense but it is well intended.

It won't be the first time that I've been a hipocrite on this forum, so here I will go again. You've been to more meetings in a week than I've been in the last 7 years, so if you feel 3 meetings a week is too much, well commit to one. You've been around long enough that you can only do it for yourself and breaking through isn't gonna be easy! ' Nothing in life worth having comes easy '.... so they say and no coincidence these old sayings hang around for an age....

Posted on:
Thu, 30/03/2017 - 22:24

LifeBegins

Joined:
2013-03-28

Hey you. Listen, without meaning to be unkind, you knew this was coming. You knew before you bought the dog, but you went and bought it anyway. And now it's an excuse not to go to meetings. Please reread your post #3268. It made a lot of sense and it seems to be the perfect answer to yourself right now. Your sponsor is looking out for you. She's got your back, and part of that is pointing out things you might not want to hear. You're doing so well S. Don't let this be another toy throwing that you'll regret xx

Posted on:
Sat, 01/04/2017 - 16:13

Amom

Joined:
2014-10-09

Hi Sandra

It sounds like you have chosen GA for now. Can I make a suggestion? Please STICK with it... good/bad, agree/disagree, people you like/others not so much. It is like life... learning to roll with it instead of always trying to find a way out. It works if you work it!

Keep listening to yourself and keep telling your addictions to **** off.

Love to you

Cathyx

Posted on:
Sun, 02/04/2017 - 10:34

volcano

Joined:
2010-07-05

Hello ......

That's a good post from you above, it appears that the fog has cleared a little from the other day. With your new little companion it's also more reason why you need to continue with some form of external help. After all, you need to look after you first and then looking after others such as pup, filters down naturally.

Amom above is spot on, keep pushing and working it.....

Posted on:
Fri, 07/04/2017 - 12:46

ODAAT

Joined:
2014-11-10

I'm not gone Sesuo.  Battered & bruised maybe but recovery has allowed me to understand addiction a little better & sometimes all an addict has to offer is themselves, standing back up & trying again.  I have never asked for more than you from you!

Fighting pads intact...Bring it on - ODAAT 

Posted on:
Fri, 07/04/2017 - 19:11

volcano

Joined:
2010-07-05

So very true there from ODAAT, ' all an addict has to offer is themselves '

Your post doesn't come across as self pity and even if it did, who gives a **** ?

A process is never easy, it's all about finding the right sequence, I know this because it's my job and what im good at. Recovery hasn't proved a forte for me, but I try/ I learn and understand the process more than I give myself credit for. And this I believe is the extreme up and down process your going through.

The people you mentioned above, also have to be very wary with regards to there own recovery, so, I believe there not going anywhere but willing you on in your recovery but also wary about the******* there going through and also safe keeping there own recovery.

I understand a lot in the process in losing my limb and can see the suffering and the stage fellow amputees are at when there going through the journey to acceptance. Yet, I say F.A, as with any recovery you have to do it yourself, albeit with gentle nudgings of people in the know.

Keep on, your getting there. ' No pain, No gain ' so they say...

A post as I look out of the train window ..

Posted on:
Fri, 07/04/2017 - 20:21

volcano

Joined:
2010-07-05

Random Alert......

My big bro walks the thin blue line, ie a copper. We are very chalk and cheese, but in the last 3 years he rescued an abused staffie, who albeit is a bit dopey but a wonderful temperament and adopted an adorable smiling assassin baby. The staffie now has bags under her eyes as she looks out for my adorable niece.

Have a good un at work

Posted on:
Thu, 27/04/2017 - 08:45

S.A

Joined:
Before 2009

Yes I agree everything requires maintenance. Its just hard in practice isn't it?

Addiction just wants us to live on a adrenaline and the quick fix.

Take care :-)

Posted on:
Tue, 02/05/2017 - 11:34

gav123

Joined:
Before 2009

Hello there Sandra, hows things with you, thought i'd drop in and say hello, im in work currently but leaving soon to go to my first counselling session! How are you getitng on with the doggie! Excellent news re holiday something to look forward to! i know u like the sun (like me) but we are cracking some cracking weather this week, y day qas about 18 c lovely in sun! We have holoday booked for august for week as well so also  looking forward to that. Funny u should say u've had a arguement with you r sis i've had the same with my brother, we havent spoke in weeks, i broke this mould this morning and emailed him and told him i was going to counselling, im feeeling pretty scared but excited on what lies ahead, have got to put the effort in , recovery requires hard work, still keep thinking back to what someone in AA said to me, enjoy life ,  this aint a rehearsal ! it still makes me smile. take care Gavin

Posted on:
Wed, 03/05/2017 - 23:03

[email protected]

Joined:
2014-12-31

Hi Sandra,

Glad to hear things are coming together & life is looking up.

However i have to take issue with something you have written. Comparing rape to cheating kind of disgusted me. They are in no way even closely the same thing. Cheating is breaking someones trust. Rape is breaking someones soul.

Posted on:
Thu, 04/05/2017 - 00:32

[email protected]

Joined:
2014-12-31

They are not equabally horrible. I have been raped, & i have been cheated on. There is no comparison & to do so is frankley offensive

Posted on:
Thu, 04/05/2017 - 10:44

ODAAT

Joined:
2014-11-10

If you have no knowledge of cheating then is it really your place to be drawing comparisons?  

You're mad @ me & I get that but please have some empathy for people who actually know...This is not the place for airing our dirty washing!

Posted on:
Sat, 13/05/2017 - 08:00

S.A

Joined:
Before 2009

Hi... seems like your in a good place. Nice :-)

 

Posted on:
Thu, 01/06/2017 - 13:51

freda

Joined:
2009-06-24

Hi S x x

I think the problem could be - didn't you mention in the past you have been in co-dependent relationships? Where the other person needed a lot of energy and reassurance and care from you. Someone who has been as hurt as this man sounds to have been, may feel very needy and that just may have pushed you away a bit. Protective, wary instinct.

It's gone and passed now but for what it's worth - I have been raped and didn't react to your comparison. I guess I can understand why others did. I was proud of how strong you were in your insistence that you are allowed your viewpoint. This is your place to be 100% you. 

Anyway, thanks so much for your post. I believe we may be able to work it out but scared of getting into a vulnerable position as I am still rebuilding other areas of my life and when relationship hurts make me incapable of functioning, it is maybe a dangerous place to be. I agree with the animal thing - my cat has given me so much love the past few days which has helped my sore heart.

Glad to see things going so great for you!

F x

Posted on:
Fri, 02/06/2017 - 15:13

Westsider

Joined:
2012-05-23

Hi.. I've Just read your first post and It filled me up with hope. i'm back here after yet another relapse and I can do with all the help I can get. It really is a life time commitment keeping the demons away. I've seen both side of you in the last page of your posts. Sometime I awake with a heart full of sunshine. Other days I just want to escape the human condition. I enjoy your writing style. keep up the good work 

Posted on:
Sat, 03/06/2017 - 14:31

freda

Joined:
2009-06-24

Your addiction is whispering to you. What is it saying? Ask your inner child - what am I trying to escape?

Love,

F x

Posted on:
Sun, 11/06/2017 - 21:44

Jane42

Joined:
2014-10-30

Thank you for stopping by my dairy :o)

Posted on:
Mon, 12/06/2017 - 03:14

Amom

Joined:
2014-10-09

You seem to be discovering what works for and is good for you and letting go of what doesn't... you will get there :)

Cathyx

Posted on:
Mon, 12/06/2017 - 20:21

Cynical wife

Joined:
2015-06-23

Hi, Sandra,

Knock, knock, I hope you're OK. Or OKish. Saw your post to Dan and thought that I would venture in.

It's the same question that Rowland H asked Carl Jung in 1928: I practice my religion so what's the difference between that  and being spiritual, why is my religion not enough to keep me clean? But there is a difference. Spirituality is about your own individual relationship and your own personal connection with the God of your understanding, whatever such GoYU or HP may be. Religious dogma, what you do in the name of religion (eg what you eat for lunch on 25 December) is not the same thing, it doesn't necessarily involve any personal relationship or connection with a GoYU/HP.  Jung told Rowland that the solution to his problem is spiritual.

Put another way, spirituality is about having the faith to hand over control to the GoYU/ HP instead of controlling all yourself. Such is the theory, always easy enough to recite. Letting go in practice isn't so easy.

BW,

CW

Posted on:
Mon, 19/06/2017 - 11:57

freda

Joined:
2009-06-24

Hey, HS x x

I know that feeling too well. It has hovered around me lately, lurking in the shadows but has not fully grabbed me yet.

It WILL pass, it always does :-)

Sometimes breaking old patterns makes it rear its head. Feels sometimes as if to test you.

Would be up for emailing but must admit I'm very sporadic at checking them or making time to reply. How do you go about it?

F x

Posted on:
Thu, 22/06/2017 - 10:28

S.A

Joined:
Before 2009

Hi...

Still fighting the good fight I see! :-)

I appreciate your continued support, despite it falling on deaf ears for a long time now.

I think your doing great. I can do great tooo!!! :-)

S.A x

Posted on:
Sun, 25/06/2017 - 15:56

freda

Joined:
2009-06-24

Wow! Yes, I recently realised I have that badge on my chest, too. I didn't know there was a CA, I will look it up :-)

I have worked on a lot of those difficulties over the years - without literally realising the name for it - and have improved tonnes. It really is possible. Knowledge is strength, my friend. Just wondering if my talking about it recently was what triggered the realisation?

We got this!

F x

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