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#1 Posted on:
Fri, 02/06/2017 - 16:11

Donitz

Joined:
2014-05-25

Hi All, at some point in the past I must have been a member here as my username was taken, when I looked into it, it was taken by me, so I guess I must have been here before at some point.

I'd like to give a quick intro, I have a responsible job, I am well aware of the maths behind gambling ie:- in the cold light of day, you can only really win every now and again, you will lose over a period of time, arguments against this are made by non gambling problem people, grand national once yearlys, every now and again a works night out greyhound racing, and people who play a pound a week on th lottery. I was a licsened bookmaker, though that was 20 years ago, and I have seen many people with big gambling problems. I am no longer in that business,and I'm glad of that as it is the most corrupt business I have ever been associated with.

I have worked out that I gamble roughly £500 per week, I can't afford this and a lot of it is borrowed, I obviously don't lose this amount a week, and the times I do win hides the losses quite well, I could lose 3 weeks on the trot then win £500 and all of a sudden I am one of lifes winners! I'm sure some people here will understand that.

My biggest sins are, in order :-

FOBT (Slots, they drain money)

Casino (winning is an incredible buzz, losing though causes me days of depression, which I usually blame on other things, but I know that it's beacuse I feel stupid for losing hard earned money)

Online Slots (can drain money aswell, I genrally self ecxclude after playing one, but new ones open all the time)

Horses (I usually bet £40-£50 on horses, then play the FOBT under the misguided illusion that the horses I have picked will come in and cover the losses of the FOBT, of course they rarely do)

Scratcards (Always get a couple in virtually any shopping trip, petrol station etc)

Oncourse Dogs and Horses, ironically, I usually go to these socially and don't really bet much, I'll generally match what everyone else is betting, a few pounds.

 

I need to stop this madness, and I am welcome to any ideas.

Posted on:
Fri, 02/06/2017 - 19:15

alainepo

Joined:
2016-07-27

Hello. Blimey i know pretty much how you must be feeling. £500 a week is an unsustainable loss which when are in the middle of a gambling storm can seem the be all and end all. But it's the time that worries me the most, every waking minute i was either gambling or thinking of the next gamble or switching monies around to cover loans. Even when i did win big i never got to enjoy it as it was always reinvested at some point so winning became irrelevant, it was just the same as losing except with a few extra groceries that week. We never win it back and even if we did it wouldn't make us happy it just became my life, not know what else to do was a big a hurdle to overcome. It sounds like gambling is totally running your life with all the dog track trips, scratchcards, FOBT sessions, horses, casinos and online slots. What else are you going to fill your time with? We all know pretty much anything is better than gambling but once it has become the norm it isn't that easy to replace, kind of like being married to a totally unsuitable ogre who won't let you do anything but you plod on with them regardless even though you hate every minute of it. How about GA to take up some of your time and give you time to think and see how others manage? How about seeing your GP or even on here to get some counselling, once you start talking your situation through you will probably find you have some great ideas but have never given yourself time to act on any of them? How are your fitness levels? Are they so good that you wouldn't benefit from some exercise and diet changes? When was the last time you went for a long walk and give yourself time to think away from the stinky bookies? What lesson about why are here on Earth can we ever learn on a FOBT? Sat in a group talking to others we might just learn something about ourselves and how to interact with other people having problems, feeling like we are the only ones affected is not good for us i don't think. The thing you are never going to win more of when gambling is time, we all lose our time no matter what we do but there are so many better ways to spend your time. Next time you see something either in person or on TV about someone struggling with money in life be it a single parent struggling to feed their kids or a foreign kid earning pennies rummaging through rubbish to sell on a refuse site, put yourself in the position of explaining your £500 a week gambling habit to them and wonder how that conversation would pan out. I know there are better things to do, you know there are better things to do, everyone on here knows there are better things to do but doing them isn't quite so easy. Letting it all go is hard no matter how much pain it is causing us but i am sure you never saw your life going like this when you were younger, you even describe it yourself as madness. Let's spend our time better and give ourselves a little breathing space first to see what can happen, what have you tried in the past to help you stop? What are you going to do different this time? Make a plan even if the first plan is not to gamble this weekend it is still a very good plan and see where it goes from there.

Posted on:
Fri, 02/06/2017 - 19:52

Donitz

Joined:
2014-05-25

Thanks for the reply, I can see you know what you're talking about :) I have had plans before, mainly cutting out FOBT machines, they are the worst, a casino trip is generally once a month, and no matter what my intentions on entering, if I'm losing I will withdraw more money to chase, money is different in a casino it isn't £1000 in real money while I'm there, it's just tokens. I will withdraw on credit cards, move money round on my phone, I've even taken a payday loan while in there for £500 and lost that, I remember a few weeks back I had a new credit card and on the first day I maxed the card to a grand and lost it all, I now have that debt for nothing, it feels so stupid and if I had to explain it to someone I would be so embarrassed about it. So my plan is this, I shall cut out all forms of gambling with the exception of on course betting, and the only reason for that is because it's the place I gamble the least, it's where most of my work social nights are and I am a fan of horse racing as a sport, I think that I can manage that? I shall cut out casino and also lottery and scratch cards, and hopefully that is a start.