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Posted on:
Fri, 15/09/2017 - 20:39

Compulsive Gambler

Joined:
Before 2009

Itmattersmore, 

I totally get where you are coming from and did have to revisit my whole post after reading your comment, i think in the whole context it is blunt but fair.  i think yellow needed a reality check - I certainly didnt suggest she should end the marriage and I hope she doesnt but with children involved Im scared for any cg, including myself.  ive already changed the course of my childrens lives and not in a positive way, because of my choice to gamble.  Once again I hope they can regain a positive marriage

fair challenge from you though

Posted on:
Sat, 16/09/2017 - 08:22

Merry go round

Joined:
2017-06-08

Congratulations on your new baby, I missed this earlier on in the week. My daughter was born 11:58 on the 12th September. My cg said 'I don't want her born on the 11th and Friday 13th is unlucky!' How the mind of a cg works? I hope she brings you both much joy. 

Posted on:
Sun, 17/09/2017 - 20:15

Compulsive Gambler

Joined:
Before 2009

many thanks MGR much appreciated!  thankfully I didn't have any of those thoughts, weirdly though I did today think I could buy a scratchcard whilst getting shopping, I didn't and it was quickly banished from my mind but equally I hate the way that works, just from nowhere and for no justifiable reason

anyway another day of no gambling, tomorrow will be the same

Posted on:
Mon, 18/09/2017 - 22:02

Compulsive Gambler

Joined:
Before 2009

165GF

 

Posted on:
Mon, 18/09/2017 - 23:09

ALAN 135

Joined:
Before 2009

Soon be changing the diary title to 200 day's gamble free Dan :)) 

Well done mate !!

Posted on:
Tue, 19/09/2017 - 11:12

Compulsive Gambler

Joined:
Before 2009

thanks, as always Alan, very supportive!

just worked out I've paid just shy of £6k in bank charges in last 6 years... I dread to think what the previous circumstances were - i.e a LOT more!

a crazy, sad situation  - if i add in the interest and charges paid elsewhere I've probably been spending 1/3 of my wage servicing debt for the last 20 years.  add in the principle repayments and I would think it's more than 2/3 of my wage gone, so effectively I've contributed less than 1/3 of my wage to the family and thats probably being generous! throw in my essential costs, commuting/food and its no wonder i kept increasing the debt wherever i could, because i was too weak to tackle my addiction - what a waste of life - and not just mine!

day by day I need to continue reversing that trend

im an addicted gambler but today I will choose to not gamble

 

Posted on:
Wed, 20/09/2017 - 09:43

Soggycash

Joined:
2017-09-19

The happy person will still be inside you.  

Posted on:
Sun, 24/09/2017 - 23:35

Compulsive Gambler

Joined:
Before 2009

Thank you

 

Day 171

finding it harder to make time to post on here but I do try and read regularly - at least once or twice a day

some tough and challenging moments, marriage continues to be like a roller coaster but 5 couples within immediate social circles have split in last two weeks, it's quite a wide group and across a range of married/ engaged/ long term relationships but even so its been very sobering to witness and think it 'should be me' before any of those yet as I type I remain with a finger nail grip on my marriage and I'm trying to cling on.  I guess without also being a doormat - some of the stuff being flung my way are just easy cheap shots but I have to suck those up where I can.

a **** week of work ahead, really not looking foreward to it on any level but it's another week that we shall get through

still the total gambling abstinance continues, still I remain a big advocate of talking to loved ones and taking the hit that comes with that.  This addiction is hard enough to tackle when it's open, let alone when we try and keep it hidden

starting to get replies on irresponsible lending complaints etc, not looking too hopeful as my wage good enough to warrant the borrowing but have had £100 refund offered and agreed - it's £100 I didn't have last week, £100 off the debt mountain, one more brick removed from the wall I need to take down and best of all it's £100 that I shall choose not to gamble

If any friends and family members happen across this can I just pay tribute.  F&F updates are the first I look for, the ones I take most from and I think the most honest and raw - so thank you to any that post

also the regular contributors, Alan, Phil etc - it's inspiring to see how much times goes into your own recoveries and how generous you are in offering support to others, across the board

I'm Dan, I am an addicted gambler and have been for twenty years, today however I am choosing not to gamble

 

 

Posted on:
Mon, 25/09/2017 - 11:17

Merry go round

Joined:
2017-06-08

Hi dan, I try with every good intention not to fling insults at my cg. It doesn't help, doesn't make me happy or him. You and others are not bad people, you didn't intentionally go out to create a mountain of debt. There is a lot to be said in 'let it go' . We are here to be happy. Life has many obstacles to throw at us. I hope your wife gets support. We all deserve happiness. 

Posted on:
Mon, 25/09/2017 - 15:20

ALAN 135

Joined:
Before 2009

Hi Dan :)) . Look I'm the last person that should be giving any sort of marital advice with one failed marriage behind me but you know your gonna have some of the brown stuff flung your way right ? and she's kinda got every right I suppose , I had a few shall we say " Whitty remark's " aimed at me initially but I really expected and deserved  a lot worse if I'm honest from my partner but we survived :)) . 

Maybe and I'm not blaming this entirely before all the ladies have a pop and lynch me but if memory serves youv'e just had a recent arrival ? So it could also be down to the extra workload not to mention a bucketload of those " Hormoney " thing's ? ( just sayin ) :)) . If the foundations are good mate then anything can be rebuilt as that's the important bit :))

I'm also an addicted Gambler who's pleased to walk alongside you in your recovery :)) 

Stay positive my friend , things have away of working out :))

Posted on:
Wed, 27/09/2017 - 16:29

Matt 24

Joined:
2012-04-25

Hi Dan

Proud to read your progress mate, starting to inspire others with your journey. Well done.

Matt

Posted on:
Sun, 22/10/2017 - 11:57

Compulsive Gambler

Joined:
Before 2009

DAY 199!!!

I knew it had been a while, very very busy trying to deal with finances, some minor progress with therapy etc made as well but I've also made a lot of affordability complaints, if you are reading this and have had any back to back payday loans, get yourself over to a website called debt camel today!  it's long winded but I've now had over £3k refunded - which is one more debt cleared.  I think the time is nearing when these companies will be folding or time will elapse on your being able to complain.

Don't bother making the compalint if you are still gambling though, any refund will just go to the bookmakers.

For me, as I close on day 200, inspired by the likes of Alan135 and Matt24 and whipped into shape by the F&F members I am delighted by the debt shrinking

I remain a compulsive gambler but today and tomorrow I be choosing to not gamble

Posted on:
Sun, 22/10/2017 - 20:10

Merry go round

Joined:
2017-06-08

Good for you, I think those loan companies are immoral.

Posted on:
Mon, 23/10/2017 - 20:01

Compulsive Gambler

Joined:
Before 2009

thanks MGR - another fantastic poster!

Well day 200, another shocker, demoralising day at work and a tough one with family, however one full of celebration and positives as it's another day that I chose not to gamble, tomorrow I will do the same

Posted on:
Mon, 23/10/2017 - 20:52

degenerate

Joined:
2013-05-10

Well done CG, getting to 200 days is not easy. Be sure to reward yourself for your achievement.

Posted on:
Mon, 23/10/2017 - 22:22

Abstainer

Joined:
2017-05-10

Congratulations Compulsive Gambler on 200 Days Gamble Free. A big achievement ...stephen 

Posted on:
Sat, 04/11/2017 - 11:52

Compulsive Gambler

Joined:
Before 2009

many thanks for the kind posts.

212 days GF and the debt continues to reduce.

Marriage remains on the line but I have more hope than I did 6 months ago.

If you are just starting your own fight and are reading this, please give it 100%, face into the consequences of your actions, whatever those might be.

I am a compulsive gambler but today I will choose to not gamble

Posted on:
Sat, 04/11/2017 - 21:09

Amom

Joined:
2014-10-09

I saw your post on a F&F thread. Your honesty and self awareness will serve you well fighting this addiction. 

Best Wishes

Cathyx

Posted on:
Sun, 05/11/2017 - 22:17

Compulsive Gambler

Joined:
Before 2009

Many thanks Cathy - much appreciated (and I hope so!)

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